This is just a short story that came into my mind while thinking about what is going on with our dearest baby Prem. I don't know but I kind of imagine that we are experiencing the same. I can imagine that he is in a dark place or a black hole at the...
I have been through so many ups and downs lately that I literally feel like I am struggling to survive every single day. Fortunately, I have been saved by the BL fandom especially thru reading and writing fanfictions. I have been fighting my depression for so many years though I never get to consult a psychologist yet cause I am afraid and literally just a coward.
Anyways, I am still surviving thanks to all my fandoms but sometimes I feel so much pain whenever I I find out my saviors aka idols / faves / babies are also going through depression. I always wish I can be of help to them just like how they have been helping someone helpless like me.
I am so worried about Prem although I don't really understand what is going on but I can just feel that he is going through something. I know he is strong enough to survive whatever it is he is going through and I believe he is very much capable of bouncing back to his normal self anytime soon. I also trust that every one around him especially his family, P'Paaty, close friends, Boun and the others are all doing their best to support him and show him how much he is loved and appreciated.
But here I am, I just ended up doing this story to distract my self again. I was trying to get myself drowned with loud music to temporarily forget about the reality but instead a story plot popped up in my head.
I got inspired by a song of One Ok Rock, titled Stuck In The Middle.
(ps. I personally like to listen to loud songs whenever I feel too overwhelmed with stress)
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You can listen to it below if you want to but it's okay if you don't like listening to this type of song.
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******* PREM'S POV *******
Lately, I have been busy trying to achieve so many things I wanted to do. I have been trying my best to be active as much as I can by accepting every project, interviews, guesting, events and others that came my way.
I was feeling so happy with all the blessings that have come my way. I was ecstatic to do everything that I can to make my fans happy cause it makes me happy too. Of course, I still did my best with my studies at the same time. I have been literally busy the past months but all I know is I am happy so I didn't really mind no matter how tired my body feels at the end of the day.
Everything felt surreal to me as I never really expected that I will get this much appreciated, loved and supported so I really wanted to give everything that I can to return the favor. The fans have endlessly been trying to show us how much we are valued so I also wanted to show them how much I value them by being active and doing new things as frequent as I can.
