Touch The Sky | ✓

Fourteen

 When I was sixteen, my grandmother died and it nearly shattered all of us.

Dad, who's quiet at the best of times, hardly spoke for months as he grappled with the grief of losing his mother. Mom tried to compensate, but Terry and I both saw right through her. How couldn't we?

Terry and I struggled in our own ways, both of us still being in school. Katie was away to college by then, but we still talked to her about it.

My memory of that period in our lives is so vivid, of the pain that we each suffered through on a daily basis.

Nothing that I felt then, though, can help me imagine how it must be for Seth after losing his wife.

I watch him pensively as he gently sorts out the ingredients for the soup on the counter. Almost too gently, actually, as though he's afraid that if he makes too much noise the air around us will shatter.

He spots me observing him and sighs. 'How about I make you the soup first, then we can sit down and talk properly? I'm kind of hungry,' he admits.

Despite myself, I smile gently at him. 'Of course,' I agree, deciding to push my worrying thoughts aside for just a few minutes. 'Is there anything I can do to help?'

To some gentle background music, the two of us work together almost silently, save for the odd instruction from Seth here and there. Interestingly, it doesn't really feel awkward at all.

As the soup is simmering at the end, I set the table, while Seth goes to the toilet. I take out some fresh bread that I bought yesterday on my way back from work, as well as some Doritos and hummus from the fridge.

Just then, Rose emerges from her room, dressed as though she's ready to go out somewhere. Spotting me by myself in the kitchen, she quickly rushes in and embraces me. 'Hey, is everything okay? I'm just going out to meet Mandy for lunch.'

I nod, my eyes darting the corridor in case Seth comes back. 'I'm fine,' I murmur softly. 'It's fine, I'll see you later.'

She holds my gaze for a moment, to check that I'm really telling the truth. I don't waver though, so she smiles and squeezes my hand tightly. 'Okay.'

Not a minute after she's gone, Seth reappears. His smile is a little pained, but it's there nonetheless. 'How's the soup looking?'

'Pretty good,' I return. 'I'm not sure when it's done, though.'

After inspecting it, he leaves it on the heat for a moment or two longer, then takes it off and looks at me. 'Have you got some bowls?'

I reach into a cupboard and produce two mismatched bowls, because apparently, we're incapable of having matching crockery in this flat. I wait for him to dish the soup out, then settle in the seat opposite him at the table.

We eat lunch quietly, letting the music drift over us. Anyway, it's not really like there's much we can talk about, with the giant elephant sitting in the room.

My only comfort lies in the fact that while it's a little awkward, it's not unbearable. At least we seem to have agreed on the silence, as opposed to awkwardly trying to make small talk.

After lunch, we wash up, still in this almost-comfortable silence.

'Would you like a hot drink?' I ask, once I've put the last of the dishes away.

He appears to consider my offer for a moment, before nodding. 'A coffee would be great, thanks.'

'You were right, by the way,' I tell him conversationally as I make us two coffees. 'You do make a mean pea soup.'