Acting in a zombie apocalypse bxb

Chapter 8

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Acting is all around us, its not like peoeple arn't aware, they just are blind to the truth, many people act and lie, although lies are different they are still something to protect yourself, weather its just a small white lie, or a lie that could have your life on the line. Everyone acts, your friends, your parents, those hosts on TV shows, even yourself, you lie to yourself, as your mind tries to make you belive that this can last forever, me and jay walking side by side in silence shoulder to shoulder, no zombies no fighting, so serene i can almost ignore the harsh reminder, the blood littering the streets. Yes. This sweet peaceful silence is nice.

I flinch when i feels a warm hand entering mine but relax quickly, peaking at Jay, who's looking at me with a slight smile. "i wish this could last forever" he said quietly, my eyes widen slightly but i nod giving one of my only true smiles, although small, i was honestly surprised such a small notion made me smile, i looked into his eyes so full of life, acting was a way of life, but... he was so truthful and it made me feel the most guilt i've ever felt in my life. Thats when i decided, i was going to tell Jay, i was going to tell jay that i was a number.

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I was scared, for what felt like the first time in years, i was nervous, my heads beating like crazy, invading my ears, so loud i thought i was having a heart attack. I was standing outside the door to our room, i could hear him inside. I took a deep breath, this isn't like you, you're supposed to be brave and independent, this isn't good i'm getting too dependent, maybe i shouldn't tell him and just leave? It would be safer and stop me from being rejected by him, yeah tonight then ill leav-

"Alex? Whats up" i jump looking up to see Jay standing in the door in all his glory, as i stared into his eyes, they pulled me in, and without thinking i say "I need to talk to you." 

HIs eyes went slightly wide at how serious i was, but he nodded and led me inside as we sat on the bed side by side in silence. I was quiet for a while until i stood up knelling down in front of him he looked confused and i can't exactly blame him "Please l-let me explain, i-im sorr-" i chocked up and gulped to calm and stop myself from tearing up, whats going on with me i've never begged before. He looked worried and he put hi arms around me lifting my up from the floor into his lap hugging me. I stuffing my head in his shoulder, shivering in bliss, i wanted to savour this, as it may be the last time he's even nice to me- or get even close to him.

 I untuck my head staring at him "please tell me whats wrong Ally..." i jolt staring at him leaning in and giving him a peck on the lips before getting of his lap, he looked frozen and blinked a couple times, i gave a small smile, at least i got to do that. i was in front of him, he looked confused until i lifted my sleeve up, he looked in confusion. "L-look at my wrist" my heart was going crazy as he leaned in holding my wrist, i think i was shaking as i stared down at him. 

He was frozen, staring at my wrist with an expression i couldn't exactly read. After a painstaking 10 minutes fo him looking at my number rubbing my wrist to see if i was drawn on. He leans back onto the bed, looking at the floor his hands linked together, fiddling with each other. after another agonising couple minutes he looks at me "Is this what you wanted to show me?" his voice wa cold, colder than i'd ever heard before, id made me shudder. i sigh, i guess he is gonna hate me, its fine, that makes sence, i did hide a pretty major thing from him. 

This is fine, this is good, ill be able to live like before, i can do this. "Why are you crying?" i flinch again looking at him in confusion until i feal the warm liquid on my cheeks, i was silent before i gave a chocked laugh, "ah... haha i don't know..." i say with a sad smile, his face was stone cold, "You where faking everything? Are you a spy?" he spoke again in a flat cold voice. I look down and then back up with a sad half hearted smile, "Don't worry, i-i'll leave now, it was n-nice b-being with a-all of you, e-even if it -e-ends up like t-thi-

"Why do you think i'll let you leave?" 

I blink slightly, oh... he wants to kill me... haha... this is what i get for being trash i guess. I don't mind him killing me, if it makes him feel better thats good, i wouldn't  want the leader to be depressed, yeah... if its him, he can kill me. i kneal down on the floor again in front of him, smiling sadly awaiting my fate. 

"if i'd calm y-your anger, i-i don't mind i-f you kill me." i was no longer crying, i was content, this is a good way to go, with these happy memories, i'd be easier to die, even if i were to leave, i'd probably throw myself into zombies, haha... i really am the worst. 

It was silent for a  while, the uneasiness setting in, until i looked up and i broke, his face was one of pain and conflict, unlike the stone cold expression from before, it almost made me tear up again. "why... Why do you want me to kill you?" i blink again, confused, he's not killing me straight away? i think a bit his voice was shaking, sad, vulnerable. Maybe... he doesn't want to kill a human. 

I stare at him again "I-If you d-don't want to kill a h-human, i can kill myself for y-you" i say, as i open a portal and grab a gun, holding it to my head. his eyes were broken, but also surprised i give him a smile, this is a nice way to go, in front of the one i love, Love? was it love or infatuation... i'd never thought i could feel love, after all i'm acting trash. 

I look at him one last time admiring his looks, he will become a great leader. Without hesitation i smile a happy smile, a sad smile. Pressing the trigger hearing a loud bang and everything went black.

Yeah... this is nice

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Hi humans, i cried a bit  writing this chapter, really, sorry i haven't been updating, recently, been kinda busy with school and that. I'm honestly not even sure if people are still reading this book lol. Someone wanted a Q&A so ill post that next, wanted to post a chapter with the Q&A so it's not a false hope. Byeeee.

Word count: 1142