Jelly is a broken soul escaping from her torturous past. She's shut herself off from emotions and people. Trying to start her life from scratch she moves to a new town.
Finding a mysterious shop she comes across an offer she can't refuse that promi...
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Tuesday, the day I've been trying to avoid the most. Namjoon was nice and he didn't push me, but his question shook me. I tried to think about it, but I still didn't have an answer so I tried to cancel my meeting like the coward I was.
Namjoon of course was not having it. He said he would meet me at my home and that made it worse cause there was no escaping it. I had to go home at some point. I stressed so much about it that Eric finally had enough and sent me home saying he would give me an extra day off to deal with whatever I needed to. I thought it was perfect. I would make it home before Namjoon showed up and could just hide inside and pretend I wasn't there... Wrong! Namjoon was sitting on my porch with a book in his hand waiting for me.
"Hey, you're here early!" He says surprised.
"Hey... Uh, yea I got off early today why are YOU here so early? I ask with a frown on my face now that my plan has been ruined, I'm going to have to deal with him.
"Let's just say I had a gut instinct about you." He follows close behind me as I walk into the house.
"Go and get relaxed. We aren't leaving today. It's time for you to answer me." He gestures to the hallway as he takes a seat on the couch.
"I'll be waiting for you Tiny One," he says with a laugh.
"Just 'cause you're the real life BFG doesn't mean you can call me tiny!" I say with a small pout.
"BFG?" he asks, confusion written all over his face.
"You know Big Friendly Giant?" I sass back before running to my room to change.
I purposely take as long as possible trying to avoid him but 45minutes later I'm sitting on the couch with him demanding at least some sort of answer and me arguing about how that question doesn't have a real answer.
"GOD JOON STOP OKAY I DON'T KNOW" I finally yell exasperated.
"I don't know who I am anymore okay? What kind of stupid question is this if you are still trying to answer it, how am I supposed to?" My anger is at the forefront. This is how I deal with real emotions; I get angry as a defense.
"Your answers are also inside yourself; you just need to find them." Namjoon doesn't look bothered at all as he replies to me. He just sits there calm and collected with a stupid smug smile that makes me even angrier.
"What the fuck kind of answer is that Joon?! Get out of here with your philosopher bullshit I don't need it!" I know I'm being harsh but he has me panicked and all I can think of is to lash out so he will leave.
"Calm down Jelly, I didn't ask you this to make you upset I asked it because if you don't know who you are how can you know what you want to be? Where do you want to go? How can you find your passion without knowing yourself?" Namjoon moves to kneel before me, I can see what he's trying to do. He's trying to make himself smaller, so I feel less threatened. He's trying to get me to relax.
"I don't know who I am Joonie..." I softly let out I feel my anger leaving as fear replaces it.
"I used to be outgoing and friendly, I used to love reading and going out in nature, I used to be up for an adventure. But that persona is gone now it's been replaced with who I am now, and I can't even figure out who she is." I'm not even sure he can hear the words I'm saying at this point my voice is so low.
"I told you that this is something I always question because we as people are always changing. Maybe I made a mistake yesterday, but yesterday's me is still me. I am who I am today, with all my faults. Tomorrow I might be a tiny bit wiser, and that's me, too... you don't have to have a perfect answer Tiny One you just have to always think about it and decide who you want to be." His large hands reach up to pull me into his embrace and he hugs me like a baby as I cry.
He just sits there on the floor with me on his lap as he strokes my hair trying to calm me down. When I finally manage to separate myself from him, I'm embarrassed for how I reacted to him. For how close I let him get to me. What the hell is going on with me? How are they getting in so easily?
"Are you okay Tiny One? It's about time for me to go. Will you be alright alone tonight?" He asks as he stands up wiping the nonexistent dirt off his pants.
"Yeah Joonie I'm okay I'm sorry for yelling at you... I'll see you next week?" I asked not sure if he would want to keep coming after our argument.
"Of course! But you know you can reach out if you ever need to talk in between meetings." He flashes me a short tight-lip smile that shows off his dimples.
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"Okay have a good night Joonie," I say as I get up to walk him to the door.
"Not so fast Tiny One! Your question to think over is 'Is it easier to love or be loved?'" He asks me as he walks to the door. He leans down and kisses the top of my head before leaving me to ponder another question.
Where the hell did he get that nickname?
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What did you guys think of her answer My Little Coconuts?!
I had a hard time writing a soft Joon after watching ON: E who else watched the Boys?
As Always I Purple You All!!
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