the heart wants what it wants | sooshu

day in the life

Hey guys! I hope you're all well! I've thought about the plot, and I like where this is going, so I believe that I'll keep this up for now. Please let me know what you think with a comment. It will be greatly appreciated!

This chapter is from Shuhua's POV, enjoy!

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"How is she, doc?"

Shuhua stood in the hospital room, her face void of emotion, the only resemblance being a pale, snow white in which the color was completely drained.

She hated seeing this.

"The same, Shuhua. I'm sorry to have to keep telling you this, but there isn't much we can do. She's on thin ice, kid." The doctor looked guilty, weary even. Shuhua could only nod, getting angry with herself for expecting something different, that maybe one morning she would wake up and everything would be fine again.

"Thanks for the update, Seokjin. I'll be back next weekend, after my shift at the church is over."

"I'll be here, then. Shuhua, remember to lighten up a little, will you? I know things aren't looking great, but she wouldn't want you to loose your happiness, would she? Plus, you always have Namjoon and I to lean on, our doors are always open." Seokjin responded, as Shuhua sighed, giving him a nod before heading out of the door.

What did I do to deserve this?

Shuhua walked along the pavement, her heart heavy as she muttered incoherent words, the pathetic nature of tears falling down her exotic features. She didn't want to cry, she's been broken for long enough by this.

It wasn't her fault that her mother was on the brink of death, it wasn't her fault that she can't even give her little sister Xiao a good life, so why did it feel as if it was?

The emptiness felt almost familiar, almost as if it was normal by now; that's what hurt her the most, that these feelings of hopelessness and despair were normal. That it was her life now, to struggle to get food on the table, to work relentlessly, knowing that what you're doing isn't necessarily right.

But that's what happens when people leave you alone. Her father left, her aunt disappeared, and now her only parental figure is relying on her for the survival of the entire family. A 17 year old can only resort to too much, and some of these things are unbearable to speak about, but she doesn't have any choice.

If she wants to survive, she'll take anything she can get. Even if it's unmoral.

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6:30 am

Shuhua groaned as she exited her bed, her feet hitting the creaking floor softly as she tiptoed through the small apartment, her mouth emitting small sighs as she quickly made herself a cup of coffee, letting the cinnamon taste collect on her tongue as she breathed slowly. This was the only relaxing part of her day, everything else was pure chaos.

She was ultra busy today, there was barely any time for relaxation, not like Shuhua knew what that felt like these days.

"Come on Xiao, wake up for me please." She muttered, her adorable 7 year old sister stirring in her sleep as an innocent smile was plastered on the little girl's face at the sight of her sister.

"Hi Shushu!" Shuhua smiled, gently helping Xiao out of her bed before placing the newly made breakfast on the table.

"I made your favorite, pancakes! Eat up, baby!" She tickled her sister, little giggles erupting out of both of their mouths as Shuhua laughed, watching her sister eat her breakfast without a care in the world.