FLATLINE| JK

twenty five

TAEHYUNG'S POV

"Okay, so, you didn't do it." Yoongi says to me as we stand idly at the circulation desk of the emergency room. After the whole debacle of the Bong Soon's photos, Dr. Jeon assigned me to Chief Kim's service in the ER, with none other than Yoongi. It's safe to say I'm about ready to kill myself, considering the ER is ridiculously slow and I'm stuck with the person I least want to be around. The only person higher on my Kill List than myself is Dr. Jeon, so I guess he's lucky I'm not on his service. After what he said earlier, and after seeing the look of devastation on Bong Soon's face, I wanted to kick him hard where the sun doesn't shine to ensure he can't have children. The last thing the world needs is more evil spawn.

"Obviously." I snap at Yoongi, crossing my arms over my chest, and he nods. Yoongi has made it his mission to discover the culprit behind the photos. It's nice that he wants to help, but him helping also means that he has to talk to me, and I absolutely hate it. If Yoongi hears the bitterness in my tone, he doesn't acknowledge it, only continuing to speak.

"Right, and it's not Hoseok. He's too pure for that. Jimin wouldn't do something like that, either, he would have been crying out of guilt within seconds." Yoongi continues to narrow down the list. "Do you think Jisoo did it? Personally, I don't think she cares enough to go out of her way and publicly humiliate Bong Soon, but, we're also not that close with her." Yoongi reasons, and I just shrug, hoping that if I express enough disinterest Yoongi will leave me alone. "C'mon, Tae, you're the most opinionated person I know. You've got to think someone is responsible."

"You seem to have everyone covered." I reply dryly, and Yoongi just squints at me.

"This hospital is ginormous. I have determined three innocent people." He deadpans, and I sigh, tiring of being civil. If Yoongi wants my opinions, he can have them—all of them.

"Fine. What about you?" I say, turning to him with raised eyebrows. Yoongi looks at me quizzically.

"What about me?" He asks, and I scoff.

"Did you do it?" I answer, and Yoongi's face falls.

"Seriously?" He clarifies, and I nod.

"Yeah. You seem extremely passionate about pinning this on someone. Is that because you're trying to cover your own ass?"

"No, of course not." Yoongi says seriously. "As much as Bong Bong bothers me sometimes, I wouldn't do something this low. You know I'm not like that, Tae." A response immediately pops into my brain, and as much as I know I shouldn't say it, I can't help it. He has called me "Tae" twice in the past five minutes as if we're close. As if we're affectionate. As if he didn't kiss me and act like it never happened. And that is what irks me to the point of no return.

"Do I really know you're not like that, though?" I counter, and Yoongi furrows his eyebrows in confusion, a little hurt. "Maybe before I would have thought I knew you well enough to know you wouldn't stoop this low. Now, though...I don't know if I'd put this past you." I say, watching as my words process in Yoongi's brain, watching as they sting. His pretty lips flatten into a thin line of resignation and understanding.

"Taehyung, please. Don't be like this." He says, and my eyebrows shoot up into my hairline, the anger I've been trying to keep at bay all this time reaching a peak.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is my behavior bothering you?" I practically hiss through clenched teeth, fighting the urge to raise my voice. Yoongi sighs, running a hand through is hair in exasperation.

"Shit, no, that came out wrong. I didn't mean it like that." Yoongi explains feebly, and I chuckle humorlessly.

"Wow, you saying and doing things you don't really mean? I'm sensing a pattern." I say icily, not holding back at all anymore. The previous hurt on Yoongi's face has only multiplied, and I hate that I feel bad. I shouldn't feel bad.

"I'm sorry, Taehyung. I just...I can't." Yoongi says. He doesn't need to explicitly specify what it is he can't do. All of the things he can't do are implied, and I hear them, loud and clear. He can't admit to himself that he's gay. He can't get over the crippling anxiety of anyone finding out. He can't be with me. "I wish I could, but I can't. And I need you to understand that. I don't want us to be like this. I want to stay friends."

"If you wanted to stay friends, you should have told me that before you kissed me. And don't get it twisted for one second, Min Yoongi—you are the one who asked to be kissed. I asked if you were sure, and you said you were. I gave you time to think about what you wanted, and, in that moment, you wanted me."

"I did, Taehyung." Yoongi interjects, as if trying to make me feel better, but I keep going before he can.

"Well, you don't get to want me one minute and not the next, Yoongi. I deserve better than that because I am fucking amazing, if you haven't noticed. It took me a long ass time to figure that out, but I am. And you don't get to make someone as amazing as me feel shitty just because you're projecting your inner bullshit. I never wanted to pressure you, and you know that. I would've been completely understanding if you told me I was wrong about you being gay that day, Yoongi. I would've been fine if you said you didn't want to come out yet, or be with me at all. But, instead, you asked me to kiss you and then avoided being seen with me. You took advantage of me. You lead me on. And I'm not going to be friendly and understanding anymore, because—"

"You deserve better." Yoongi interrupts, voice gruff with emotion. I finally realize he has tears welling in his eyes, and that stupid guilt aches in the pit of my stomach. "Don't cry, you're right." I didn't even realize I was crying, and swiftly wipe my tears.

"I know." I say, my voice firm despite the lump in my throat. "I know I'm right. So just—just leave me alone, okay?"

"Whatever you want, Tae." Yoongi says, his voice sounding exhausted.

"I want—" I start, but my voice falters. You! I want you! I want you to see how amazing you are! I want you to want me, too! "I want you to stop calling me Tae."

"Okay, Taehyung." Yoongi says, the syllables heavy on his tongue. I sigh shakily, rolling my shoulders back and lifting my chin up—remembering who I am. Kim Taehyung doesn't feel remorse for people who don't deserve it.

"Big trauma coming in in two minutes!" Chief Kim rounds the circulation desk and Yoongi and I break eye contact, him clearing his throat. "Gown up and meet me in the ambulance bay!"

Like that, I'm running off to the hall to get a gown, any excuse to get away from Yoongi. Any excuse to keep him from seeing me cry. As soon as I'm alone in the hall, I let the inevitable tears fall.

hey heyyy
quick little tae yoongi moment hehe
we'll see how our girl bong bong deals w dr. dumbass next chapter! just wanted to update!

hope u enjoyed!
r