Loose Chains (Isla del Tesoro #1)

39

39

Mayoress

I cried. Hinayaan ko si Prianna na saktan ako. I should've known! Kung alam ko lang... hindi ako papayag.

I was caressing my tummy. I'm sorry baby! I'm so so sorry... Mommy will never do that again, okay? I'm sorry for putting you in danger! Kung alam ko lang!

Zennon kept on comforting me. He was hugging me as he kept on whispering things to calm me down.

He told me that the baby was fine. Goodness, thank You God! Thank You for saving my baby!

"Malakas ang kapit ni baby... Pero huwag mo ng uulitin..." He cried on my shoulder again.

Naka-upo ako sa kama at siya'y nasa gilid ko. He doesn't want to occupy that much space dahil natatakot siyang baka mawalan ako ng lugar. Kaya siniksik niya ang sarili sa gilid.

"I'm sorry..." I cried again.

Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala. I'm having a baby. We're having a baby! Me and Zennon! Us!

"Seeing you unconscious... ayoko nang maranasan pa ulit 'yon," He cried. "Why did you even let her hurt you? You're smart, I know you have your reasons on why you didn't defend yourself."

Napaiwas ako ng tingin. I was crying more! Ganito ba kapag buntis?

"She loved you. At... At ako ang may kasalanan kung bakit siya naging ganoon. I-If only I didn't barge in your life... she wouldn't have experienced unrequited love. I'm sorry Zennon... I'm so sorry..." I apologized. Lalo pa akong humikbi.

"Please don't cry... Mase-stress ka lang, hindi 'yun maganda. Baka anong mangyari kay baby..."

Tumango-tango ako. He wiped my tears ngunit hindi ko pa rin talaga mapigilan. Maybe because of my pregnancy? Kaya siguro ako nahihilo 'non...

"I mean, ever since I was young... lagi akong umiintindi. Hindi ako pumapatol kapag may umaaway sa akin, lalo na kapag sa tingin ko na ako ang may kasalanan. I let them release their anger on me. Kung iyon lang ang paraan upang hindi na sila magalit sa akin, o kahit man lang mawala ang galit nila sa akin. Pero bakit ganon? Parang lahat na lang kasalanan ko..." I bit my lip. Mas lalong humigpit ang yakap sa akin ni Zennon.

"It felt like it was my fault to even exist..." Tiningala ko si Zennon na tahimik lang na nakikinig sa akin. "Kasalanan ko ba? Tell me, Zennon... Dapat bang hindi na lang ako nabuhay? Kahit anong gawin ko... may nasasaktan ako. My existence itself destroys people without even me knowing it..."

"What? Of course not! You're a blessing!" He argued. "Ano ba ang sinasabi mo? You shouldn't think that way. Alam mo ba kung gaano ang mga taong nagmamahal sa'yo? You're a blessing to us all! You, existing, is one of the best things for me..."

"No, Zennon... You see, dahil nabuhay ako, mas lumala ang sitwasyon ng mga magulang ko noon. To the extent na lumayas sila ng Maynila... Because of me, you almost lost everything because of that issue. You could've been in jail-"

"It was my choice, okay? Kung ano man ang nagawa ko, I wholeheartedly accept its consequences. I chose that and I am not regretting it. Ang pinagsisisihan ko lang, ay ang hinayaan kitang mapalayo. But then again, if those things didn't happen, we wouldn't be here right now, at this exact moment..." He explained. "You're worthy, Meria. If only you could see yourself with my eyes, malalaman mo kung gaano ka ka-importante sa buhay ko."

"Pero sa iba? Zennon, I destroyed Prianna's future with you-"

"I never even liked her. Stop pushing me away with somebody else..." Pagod niyang sabi.