Kana 2

CH 4: Plans

After Mew left Gulf, Earth thought of Mew as a cruel person. He wished for Mew to go back to Gulf, but he did not. Mew was a fool. He did not come around even once to check on Gulf's condition. Gulf was always going crazy about how Mew must be doing, but he was rarely seen. Mew had been staying at Kao's place and Earth and Baifern knew, but no one would tell Gulf or he might rush there to meet the person who doesn't really care. Gulf was so gullible when it came to his husband. Earth wished Gulf to have punched Mew for hurting him like he did to Ace back in high school. 

Earth could think nothing but bad of Mew until they had an encounter at their secret hide out at the University.

That was the day Earth understood Mew's reasons. He had been keeping distance from Gulf to not to hurt him again. Though this distance was the thing hurting Gulf the most, but Mew was right in his own way too. Earth was the one who told him Gulf did not like being touched intimately. Mew and Gulf had already did it when Earth told him so. 

When Gulf told them about this, Earth thought he was crying because of what happened between them, but he was wrong; Gulf was hurt because Mew left him. Even in that Gulf wasn't blaming him, he said that Mew apologised for something and was crying too. 

Earth somewhere felt at fault. He could have told Mew that he could have talked to Gulf, but what he did was to shout at him for leaving his friend in that state. He was the one who did not explain everything but just one part of it. He found it his fault that his friend was in a condition so bad. 

To correct this mistake, he wanted to help the two get back together. How? even he was not sure of it. After giving himself a little time gain back his sanity that he lost upon realizing his mistake, something came to his mind. Mew did want to apologise to Gulf for everything he had done but didn't know how to. Earth thought that he will make a plan with Mew. This way both their guilt could be satisfied.

Earth had called Mew to the place where the mess began. Blue Sky cafe. There he thought of clearing it all.

***BLUE SKY CAFE***

EARTH POV...

How could I be so blind to not observe Mew's intend. Earth you were the one who created reason for the mess. Now... just talk to this guy and try to sort it all.

I was sitting in the interior of the cafe, away from the glass. I don't want anyone to notice I met Mew. Saint the other day seemed so pissed with him, I wonder what he thinks of Mew right now. If he knows I called Mew to meet me, he will kill me with his bare hands for sure. Krist on the other hand would call me traitor. He isn't even listening to his boyfriend about this matter. All he knows now is, Gulf is hurt because of Mew. No one ever liked to get in trouble with Krist, he'd smack them without any second thought. 

There I saw him coming towards me, he looked pretty unwell. Tiredness was all over his face. When he came closer to where I was sitting, I saw the bags under his eyes. He is not getting a proper sleep, his red eyes tell me he has been crying himself to sleep. He sat in front of me and gave me a weak smile asking for the reason to meet.

"I'm sorry" these were the first word to escape my mouth.

MEW'S POV...

I sat in front of Earth and smiled to greet him. He looked me in the eyes, his eyes showed sincerity.

"I'm sorry" I don't understand why he apologises.

"What for?" I was confused.

"I was the one who didn't explain you everything and caused all this commotion." He said, looking down. He was really sorry for what he did. But what did he do wrong?

"I was the one in the wrong, not you. So... why be sorry?" I was trying to join the dots. But he still consistently apologised, so I just forgave him not knowing his crime.

"Tell me, do you want to reconcile with Kana or not." Earth asked. Like, of course I want to get back to my wife but how can I do that?

"I do. Of course I want to." I said, looking down at my feet about to cry. Earth stated something that made me feel even more stupid than I already was. He said, "It's not what happened between you two that makes him sad and depressed, but you stupidly leaving him without giving him a proper reason does". "Sorry, I did not tell you everything properly that day at the cafe. If I had said that he was actually fine with the person touching him being you, it would have spared so much of drama." Earth had slight guilt in his tone. He thinks that it was him who did not explain it completely, but it was me who ran away before he could finish. 

"But, now he should be so angry with me." I reminded us both. Earth sighed, "He wasn't at first. He was waiting for you to show up again. But...". He hung me by the thread over the last word. "But?..." I asked him to continue. "But now he doesn't really like even the mention of you" he cupped his own face and breathed deeply for some time.

"And there I lose all the hope to reconcile." I tried to be sarcastic, I tried to laugh but the lips won't curl upwards at all. Earth looked at me, pity in his eyes. "Maybe, now he is angry that you did not come back all this while." Earth's 'maybe' glinted hope to me. "But you can't call your relationship off. You're married and your parents won't let you separate. In fact they don't even know this shit is happening." what he said was true. Our parents won't let us separate at any cost. Trying to reconcile is better than having a bitter relationship for the rest of our lives.

"So... how do I apologise to him?" I could only ask him. I am so lost. I can't think straight. Shit! I have been hurting Gulf all this time when I thought I went away from him for the better good. I am such a shit head! 

"Confess your feelings to him. Sincerely." that's all comes to his brains. But, Earth is one of those who know Gulf the best. I better prepare to confess my feelings, but will I get a chance to. Even if Earth is on my side, Saint and Krist are still two walls that I have to cross. How could I forget the last wall of hell fire, P'Baifern. She would kill me instead of giving me even a second with him. I am so done. "I'll try to talk to Saint, Krist and P'Baifern to let you talk to him." Earth really helps me a lot in this situation. 

"I think you should say  it in front of as many people as possible. Maybe a crowded day at the Amphitheatre could be it" Earth was now becoming dreamy. "But won't that publicize our relationship. Would he be okay with that?" I couldn't be more messed up.

"He would love it if the world knows about you two. The only reason he's been keeping it a secret is because you asked it to be. He said that you don't want to be targeted by those fans of his. In fact it would be better if everyone knew of you two. He once told me, that there was a bitch troubling you. It would even help you too, it will make you safe." Earth really is the best help. "But what if, he doesn't accept me in front of everyone. It's going to  be a bummer and I will be targeted until I graduate!" now I feel like I should go somewhere and cry for some time. "He won't. Even if he does he just wants to have a private talk with you. He won't ever do that to you." Earth comforted me. I nodded in agreement. 

I cried like a madman after I got back from the cafe. I had been acting like such a fool. If Gulf doesn't forgive me, I totally get it. I have been such a bastard to him. I deserve his anger and hatred.

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Troubles coming to an end I believe.

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Love all of you.

- Wan <3