The GilmTown mixer was approaching quickly. And Sans still hasn't decided if he should go. He usually would have put all thought of it aside and chosen to spend the night alone, but some strange feeling tugged at his nonchalant exterior.
Sans was about to settle on not going, when a fox, a dressing doll, and their Lovecraftian child walked in.
"What is this, a crossover episode?" the fox smugly remarked.
"Get out of my house."
As strange and brief as that interaction was, it served to jar something in Sans' brain. That couple lived in total... well, not mediocrity, more like the essence of houses in Tide commercials. A typical comfortable older millennial white person life. A two-story carpeted house. One where he could attain mediocrity apart from lounging in a fluffy white bag chair and getting verified on TikTok. Sans wanted that. And the first step to living a boring, non-aesthetic life was going to a cafe with someone. A friend, or possibly a dating partner. Well, that could come later. Friends. That was a good achievement to shoot for.
Unrealistic goals aside, what better place to meet people than a mixer? He was pretty sure that was the point, after all. Sans resigned himself to social interaction.
The next fifteen days passed slowly, which was normal. Soon, it was time. Sans woke up two hours before the mixer started, and triple-checked his readiness. It wasn't every day he had to talk to people besides his brother, so he had to be prepared.
April 20th. The birthday of Big Chungus. The lagomorph's half birthday was on June ninth, strangely enough. But questioning the laws of GilmTown would only result in headache, dizziness, and insanity. It is not recommended.
The ensuing celebrations would span most of the tubes, and in previous years, even into Roll City. In Twist A69, Turn 6516, Lord Chungus hosted a mixer, which he would appear at for the first few minutes for a brief speech about loneliness, sponsored by SoBe LifeWater. It was more directed at finding friends, although finding love was encouraged. The party would be directed by Levi Ackerman and his husband Alvin Seville. Chungus specifically chose those two to be the godfathers of his brainchild of a mixer (a mostly unknown piece of trivia: Big Chungus invented both mixers and, later, blenders) due to Alvin's last name. Chungus' skinny incarnation had appeared in a short entitled The Barber of Seville.
Chungus lore aside, the mixer was attended by nearly every friendless in Jellostone, and Sans was sure he would find the man he so wished to befriend there.
"Mor, please!" Ben Shapiro was not begging for additional things with spelling mistakes; he was pleading with his wife who was going to leave him.
"I'm tired of you, Ben. I am a human drought right now, and you simply make me arider. I'm going to stay with a friend for a while, and if I think about it, I'll come back. Goodbye." The doctor turned to leave.
"Wait! At least tell me the name of your friend, so I can come to find you, in the rain, in a romantic fashion!"
"That was an out-of-character display of feelings, Benginald. Maybe there's hope for you yet. My friend is named 1gec Kratt. She lives in Roll City. And it doesn't rain underground." With that, she was gone.
Despair looming in his unwelcome heart, Shapiro walked into the GilmTown mixer. Immediately he spotted the enjoyable skeleton and beamed.
"Hey! Uhh... Benny, wasn't it?"
"Hypothetically."
"Want some punch, man?" Shapiro accepted, and the two stood next to each other, awkwardly.
"Um... you have something... in your hair," In yet another uncharacteristic display of feelings over the obvious fact that skeletons don't have hair, Ben reached up and brushed Sans' head. Oddly enough, it felt... warm.
"Yeah, well, you have..." Sans was reaching out to pull the man closer, when-
"Ben? Oh my god, Ben! What a coincidence!" Upon hearing the voice of his estranged wife, Shapiro pulled away.
"Uh- I have a- I mean, hypothetically, not that we're- not that you-" Just then, a boom was heard from several turns away. One partygoer flinched so hard, they stumbled into Sans, reducing him to a sentient pile of bones. Shapiro leaped backwards in fright, only to be caught by Mor. Their faces were too close for comfort, each wearing a shocked expression. Then, breathlessly sweeping Ben into her arms, the doctor lifted him into the air, and kissed him.
As the couple exited the mixer, a pharmacist barged in, raving about a broken Love-Findinator. Something about a hope sweller rupturing. Then, muttering about not wanting to interfere, the strange character turned on his heel and left. Another person entered. One of the last people Sans wanted to see.
"That sure was lucky, huh Sans?" Sans' grouchy skull now bore a face of disgust. "That I stumbled in here right as you went solo. Ahahahahaha!" That laugh bore into the skeleton's marrow. It would be a while before he could move again, but he wished to be anywhere else.
Sans was staring into the crudely hopeful eyes of Nagito Komaeda.
