Deaf Bakugo AU

Chapter 8

Bakugo spent a lot of time in his room, going to class when he had to, and coming out when Kirishima made him. He spent his time thinking, which was unusual for him. He was normally a man of action and uncontrolled bursts of emotion, but thinking was highly recommended by most people, so he thought he'd give it a try. Besides, the issues he was dealing with required thinking.

After coming out to his parents he had to process a lot. He never thought that he would have such a reaction to his dad not taking it well. He was supposed to be prepared for anything. So why did that get to him...?

One day, when he was in a bit better mood, he and Kirishima were hanging out and chatting, when Kirishima suddenly spoke up, "Sorry to change the subject, but have you ever thought about getting a therapist? Or even just talking to some kind of professional?"

He had, in fact, thought about this. But he never really considered it for more than a few seconds before a new thought entered his mind.

"Not really." He replied casually. "I don't think I need it."

"I think it'd be good for you to talk to someone other than me. I'm not very good at giving advice anyway." Kirishima said, turning in the swivel chair that Bakugo had in his room, which he was sitting in with the back of the chair between his legs and his arms resting on the top, like the gæ bitch that he is.

"But it's your choice, not mine." Kirishima added.

Bakugo pondered for a moment, sitting on the bed with his back against the wall. "Well, I can't get a therapist anyway. I'm not 18, so I can't sign for my own shit, and my parents probably don't think I need it either."

"Then...you can talk to the school counselor or a teacher." Kirishima suggested.

"Sorry, but I am not talking to Hound Dog about my insecurities and crippling self doubt." Bakugo grumbled.

"Fair enough..." Kirishima murmured in response. "...How about Mr. Aizawa or All Might?" He said, clearer this time.

"All Might wouldn't have time cause he's always busy hanging out with Deku," he huffed.

"Maybe try talking to Mr. Aizawa..?" Kirishima faltered. "If you want. You don't have to. I'll always listen if you need me to."

"Nah...I'll do it. For you." Bakugo replied reluctantly. He knew that Kirishima wanted him to do it, even if he tried to hide it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As class ended the next day, Bakugo went up to his teacher's desk.

"Yo, Mr. Aizawa, can we talk?" Bakugo asked hesitantly, somehow still maintaining his usual harsh and irritated tone.

"Sure, I guess." The tired man replied.

"So...have you ever suffered from crippling self doubt and worrying you'll never be good enough?" Bakugo tried not to stammer.

Aizawa was a bit taken aback by this, but kept calm as best as he could. When he became a teacher he knew that he wanted to be a mentor, a father figure, possibly - that meant he had to be prepared when students required his help.

"I mean, yeah. I think just about everyone has. I've dealt with some depression and anxiety myself, I used to worry that I wouldn't be good enough to become a hero, even with difficult training." Aizawa assured. "But somehow, I eventually learned to...how do I put this...not give a damn."

"Hm?"

Aizawa pondered as the memories of high school came back. "...Basically, I learned to have more confidence in myself by...not paying attention to what others say if it isn't important, if that makes sense. I recommend listening to constructive criticism in order to improve yourself. But others' opinions of you shouldn't affect your confidence. In my case...instead of hating myself because of what other people said about me...I asked myself, 'What do I think of me?' without taking others into account."

Bakugo listened intently. He had never realized this.

"Well, hope that helps...try thinking about it. Meanwhile, I'm gonna take a nap. Make sure to do your homework, eat something, drink water, all that..." Aizawa said sleepily, zipping up his sleeping bag and flopping over onto the floor.

Bakugo could hear faint snoring as he walked out of the classroom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bakugo pondered that one question; there was almost nothing else on his mind.

'What do I think of me?'

He never really knew himself - he only knew what others thought. When he first got his quirk and received so much praise and admiration, his confidence got the biggest boost ever, it even lasted through middle school. When he enrolled in UA, however, the students teased him for being quick to anger and aggressive, almost feral. When he was training he got criticism from the pro heroes. These unfamiliar words started to seep into his self esteem, infecting it. He was never able to find a balance between overly cocky and wildly insecure.

'What do I think of me...?'

He didn't quite know.

But he would sure as hell try to figure it out.

A/N
Whaddup, I'm back from the Writer's Block™
I'm finally starting to figure out where I want the plot to go, and I'm trying to get better at writing in general, so hopefully I won't take too long to write the next few chapters.
Love you bitches <3