𝐏𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐬 || sansang

2.14 Promise me this

Time was standing still. In his mind, and all around him. Silence was screaming at him, making his head hurt, and the writing on the small piece of paper in his hand blurred up, from the tears showing in his eyes.

Yeosang suddenly got up, storming through the apartment towards the bathroom. He slammed the toilet seat up, before falling to his knees and throwing up aggressively into the toilet. Everything was spinning around him, and he felt like he could see every single thought right in front of him. Like scenes from a movie, unfolding and played out, but all he wanted was for it all to go away.

All of his emotions, all his deepest wishes and the devastating memories of lost love that had been buried deep in his heart - everything was exploding all at once, merging into one big mess in his head.

He sat down on the bathroom floor, legs pulled up and with his arms hugging around his knees. For so many years he had thought back in time, he had missed San and what they had had. He had wished for them to be together.

But now, now that it actually seemed like a possibility, he felt scared.

What if it wouldn't work out? What if the only reason he had missed San so much, had been because of the unhappiness he was forced to stay in? Yeosang bit his lip, wondering how he ever had turned out to be so ungrateful. The one thing he had wanted the most for so long, was finally within his reach, and now he wasn't even sure that he wanted it.

Then, he slowly started to think back on the past couple of months - of the time after he and San met each other again.

He had been afraid that San had changed too much - that he had moved on years ago, as would've been completely fair - if time really did heal all wounds. The anger and hurt that the younger had shown him, had surely given off that San had left their memories in the past where they belonged.

But it didn't last long before his behavior had Yeosang feeling more confused than he had in years. The name of San's restaurant, the necklace still hanging around his neck. The way he had looked at Yeosang that one night in the kitchen.

With a heavy sigh, Yeosang dove his fingers into his hair, head dropping down and he pulled his brown locks while cursing under his breath.

He felt scared. What if it wasn't real love, but simply an illusion? What if their memories wouldn't be enough for them to fall in love again?

What if...

♡

The moon was out, and the street lamps on, when Yeosang walked through the city. He had thought things over so many times, too many almost, and when his head felt like it was about to explode for the second time that night, he decided to go for a walk.

He had told himself to get some fresh air, to give his mind a break and to think of something else. But when his feet seemed to listen more to his heart than his head, he soon found himself heading down the street towards a very special place.