With Tragic Eyes and Bloodshot Dreams

Chapter 4: When the Sins of My Father Weigh Down My Soul

Heading back in their hotel rooms, Gakushu found himself caught in a very irritating ritual.

Ranking the girls in their class.

"This is inane." He complains, "And it's disrespectful to rank them like that. Even if they aren't going to know, it's still quite rude."

Isogai looks a bit abashed.

The other boys brush him off.

"Oh, come on. I'll bet the girls are doing the same in their room too."

Then they turn their sights on Karma, "Hey, Karma. Who do you like?"

"Hmm," Akabane looks very uninterested, "I mean, if I had to choose then Okuda-San is alright, I guess."

The boys question him on it, and Akabane responds with the same disinterest.

Before Gakushu could ponder that further, the boys turned their attention on him.

"Asano-kun, you're the only one who hasn't answered. Which girl do you like?"

"Yeah, everyone's said theirs, so you're not getting out of it."

Gakushu knew this was coming. "I don't like any of the girls here."

"Asano-kun! Don't give us that!"

"Yeah you can tell us. Is it Hazama-chan?"

Oh, how Gakushu despises heteronormativity.

Ren was the only one he was out to, but Gakushu really didn't care. He knew he was attracted to boys, but it wasn't like Gakushu even had time to date or whatever. He really didn't see the point in discussing this kind of stuff.

"No, really, I don't like any of the girls. Let's move on to something else now."

"You don't like any girl? What are you—gay?" Someone in the back jokes.

A few others chuckle, but Gakushu doesn't laugh.

He knows he should stay quiet, but something about the joke irritates him. He should be used to it by now, after all, most kids his age joke about queer people. They've likely never even met one. Japan isn't very progressive when it comes to these things, after all.

But he's annoyed. And after everything he's been through, everything he has to hide inside him, this was the one thing he could never bring himself to be ashamed of.

So he doesn't stay quiet this time. He speaks up.

"Do you have a problem with that?" He lifts his chin with confidence.

The room goes silent. It takes a few moments for the words to sink in, and Gakushu's heated gaze to make sense.

The boy who spoke—Maehara just stutters out, "—n-no—of course not."

Then all of a sudden, they hear a noise from the window. They spin around, to see Koro-sensei hanging from the window, eavesdropping on them. He has a notebook in his hand, and he's writing down the girl's names from Isogai's list. Did he just overhear—

"He jotted it down and ran! Kill him." Maehara shouts.

"Hold it right there you damned octopus!" They all run after him, knives held out, "Going and invading your student's privacy like that!"

Soon enough, the girls start chasing after Koro-sensei as well. In the midst of their assasination attempt, in which Gakushu helps out in greatly, his classmates work with him without bringing up what was just discussed.

After they are all tired out, they all head back to bed. He knows the tension between them is still there—homophobia doesn't go away just like that, but for the most part, his classmates treat him the same way. Akabane and Nagisa stick with him, and don't mention his sexuality again. Gakushu is grateful. He hates being defined by something he can't control.