Omnipresence ♾ Zarry

viii.

Some years later

"Are you done with lunch, Bells?" Harry asks Arabella, who nods from her toddler chair. She's an amazingly tidy toddler and not a picky eater which means that Harry is over the moon.

"Daddy, can I go play now?" Arabella asks. She's got a serious puppy eye look on, even though Harry knows it isn't intentional. She can't help it if she's so damn adorable.

"Of course you can," Harry smiles at her and stands up. He picks up his plate before walking over to her and kissing the top of her head. "Another tea party today?"

"Yes!" Arabella smiles at him, her baby teeth at full display. Harry returns the smile before kissing her cheek and taking her plate too.

"Am I invited, darling?" he asks on his way to the sink.

"Of course, daddy!" Arabella calls out excitedly. "You're always invited to my tea parties. Jolene too."

"That is so kind of you," Harry says and gives her a quick smile over his shoulder. "You can go play, Arabella, I'll be up in a moment."

"Okay, bye-bye, daddy!"

"Bye-bye."

Arabella is the best thing that has happened to Harry in his life. She's like his own personal sun, always making him happy no matter what. Harry thinks there hasn't been a day ever since she was born on a sunny May day over three years ago, when he didn't smile. Arabella, named after the Arctic Monkeys song, of course, is probably the happiest child in the world. She's not very prone to sulking, not often at least, and she doesn't really throw temper tantrums. She was a right crier when she was a baby but that time is well and gone.

Harry has had doubts that his melancholy would disappear, that his broken heart wouldn't shatter even further after she was born but they were baseless. The love he has for her helped him overcome the insurmountable grief that had been following him around, it allowed him to focus on someone else than the man he had loved and lost.

He did hope a little bit (or a lot) that Arabella would take after Zayn more than him but she's a little carbon copy of Harry. She's still little so Harry has hope that her face isn't quite done shaping itself yet. But she's still perfect and Harry sees those little things that appear, that remind him where the other half of her DNA is from. Her never-resting hands, her fanning eyelashes, her cheekbones. It doesn't scream but the whispers are still enough.

"Daddy! Come join us! I have a new guest!"

"I'm coming up right away honey!" Harry shouts back as he dries his hands. Suddenly, his mind presents him with unpleasant memories of fallen picture frames, open doors and frosty rooms.

Harry comes upstairs and goes to Arabella's room. It's a refreshed version of the nursery from when she was a baby. He's already looking forward to including Arabella's ideas in the next revamp of the room in a few years.

"I'm here, honey," Harry announces as he comes in. "Who's the new guest?"

"Oh, daddy," Arabella pouts when she looks around the small table. "You just missed him."

"Did I?" Harry asks and sits down on a pillow, ready for the tea party with empty toy cups. They tried actual tea too but now they only stick to biscuits after significant spillage and a nearly scalded arm.

"I will ask him if he wants to join us next time," Arabella says as she pours the invisible tea. "He came before, daddy. I think he's shy and doesn't want to see you."

Harry frowns at his daughter. "What do you mean, darling?"

"Oh, he just said he knows you but he saw you many, many years ago," Arabella explains like it's completely normal. "He said you're probably upset with him but he wanted to meet me anyway. I talk to him sometimes. He comes to my tea parties too. Not when you're here though."

Harry's heartbeat accelerates. "Arabella, what does this man look like?"

"Hmm," Arabella puts her finger on her bottom lip, deep in thought. "He has dark hair but it's shorter than your hair, daddy. He's very nice. But he always wears the same clothes which is weird. Maybe he doesn't like clothes."

Harry closes his eyes as the world spins around him like a fucking blender.

"Are you okay, daddy?"

"Yes, I'm alright, sweetie," Harry forces a smile onto his lips. "You know you're not supposed to talk to strangers, right?"

"I know," Arabella nods. "But he's really nice and he said he knows you and he also kind of looks like dad so I invited him to my tea party."

Harry blinks at his daughter, the ground falling from under him. "He what?"

"He looks a lot like dad," Arabella repeats nonchalantly. "But I know it's not actually dad, I'm not silly. You said that he had to go to heaven when I was still in your belly and he can't come back."

"That's right," Harry says quietly. He can feel his eyes getting flooded with tears. "I'm sorry baby, I'll be right back. Please start without me."

Harry runs out to the hallway and leans against the wall next to Arabella's door. His tears run free as he slides down the wall. His chest is wracked through with sobs and Harry can't think clearly. He wishes this was another one of those old vivid nightmares but he's not had them since before Arabella was born. Nothing has happened in the house since then. Now his inkling came out to be true.

Harry cries and cries and cries for what seems like hours. Arabella's door opens at some point and she comes up to him, asking why is he sad. Harry just shakes his head and pulls Arabella into a hug, holding her as close to him as he can. She doesn't say a word as he cries and kisses her forehead a million times. I'll keep you safe, Harry promises her silently.

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"Was it dad visiting from heaven?"

Harry looks at his daughter, her face open, innocent.

"You're a very smart girl, Arabella."

-------------------

AND THIS IS IT!!!! THAT'S THE FIC!!!! oh god writing this, it was so fucking sad i literally had to take breaks to be like "ok girl, you can do this" lmao.

THANK YOU SM SM SM SM for reading!!!! if you've managed to get here, im very thankful and im very sorry for killing zayn off in this fic fahjfgjsfdg i've had this idea about writing a fic about like someone having the child of their dead spouse for AGES so halloween seemed like the best opportunity to write it so yeah THANK YOU GUYS I LOVE YOU!