Finding Course

7

Katherine.

My muscles ached. That was the only thought I could comprehend as I started to wake. I wanted to stretch, but at the slightest movement my body protested. It was dark, but that didn't mean much. Being fall, the hours of daylight were slowly decreasing as we approached winter. For all I knew it could be 7 in the morning or 7 at night. Both times were starting to be dark.

I blinked a few times to focus my eyes and scanned the room I was in. I had no idea where I was, but at least I was safe. My leg throbbed, but didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. I could wiggle my toes, albeit painfully. Movement was a good sign. Off to the side was a large window, covered with a thick gray curtain. I could see a wood dresser which matched the platform bed I was in. To my left, there was a matching end table with a glass of water and some pills next to it. I reached for them immediately, hoping they were pain killers. I'd take whatever I could get to have some reprieve. I drained the glass in seconds and sat up slowly. Where was I? The last thing I remembered was standing on the patio outside Zane's house. Was I still there?

'Daniel?' I tried, and was met with silence. I had a sinking feeling and wasn't able to feel a connection. I wasn't sure why, but I started to fear the worst. 'Sophia?' I called, and I felt the tether between us, but she didn't answer me either. "Anyone?" I finally said out loud. I felt silly, talking to nobody. A few moments later, Charlie stepped through the bedroom door. A familiar face, thank god.

"Mornin' sunshine," he said, holding a cup of coffee to his mouth.

"What?" I was beyond confused. "What happened?"

"Well," he began as he sat down at the end of the bed. "You got yourself stuck in a hunter's trap. Zane brought you back here, and we got you patched up. Sophia's here too, just sleepin' on the couch." He seemed so laid back, as if this type of thing was a regular occurrence.

"And where is 'here?'"

"Zane's house. I'm surprised you're awake. We expected you to be out a while longer." He sipped his coffee again and just stared at me as I took in his explanation.

"Daniel?"

"Sorry sweetheart, he's gone." He frowned into the coffee cup, and grimaced.

"Gone?" I don't know why I asked the question, I heard him crystal clear. Just minutes before I had suspected it too; but suddenly it was real. Was I the reason they couldn't save him? Was it my fault? Did he die in pain? I had so many questions racing through my mind that I couldn't process it. Tears came to my eyes but didn't fall. I saw Charlie zone out, and he looked like he was speaking with someone through the pack link.

A second later he looked back at me with sorrowful eyes. I hated that look. I'd seen it so many times after my parents had died that I couldn't stand it anymore. It was the look of pity. "I'm sorry," he added. That was what everyone always said. But really, what else was there to say? A few tears escaped and I let myself feel the emotional pain as I counted to ten. Charlie put a hand on my knee, trying to be comforting. Once I reached the number ten, I opened my eyes.

"Can I have a minute?" I asked in a shaky voice.

"'Course," he answered and left the room. Once I was alone, I let myself break. I hadn't been extremely close to Daniel, but that didn't mean I didn't love him as my family. That didn't mean it hurt less, and I sure as hell felt the guilt that tore my heart apart. I just wanted some time alone. I struggled to pull myself together enough to be around anyone, specifically Zane. Instead, I remained in the bedroom and waited. I wasn't sure what I was waiting for, maybe for Sophia to come in, Charlie, or perhaps I waited for the pain to lessen. As sad as I was about the loss of my uncle, the heavy guilt completely overshadowed my sorrow. I knew exactly what the others would say: It's not your fault. That was an easy thing to state when you weren't in the hot seat of judgement.