Just Friends in the End

Nerves

        I’m sitting here getting nervous because I know that I’ll be seeing him tomorrow. And It just makes me nervous to know he’ll be there. I’m scared of how I’ll react. If he talks to me. I don’t really know what to do at this point. I don’t want to ignore him and have him like ignore me. But I know If I give him attention he’ll say something and I’ll hurt more than I already do. I don’t want to totally isolate myself because then he’ll think I’m not over him. Which I’m not.

        I did talk to his brother and he said he moved on. And he told me that what I needed to do. I know I do and I know I have to. But how could he move on so easily? 3 days after the break up and you’ve moved on? I want to be able to do it. I know I can. It’s been almost 2 weeks. And I hate being… Single. For being in a relationship for so long it get uncomfortable knowing you have no one to cuddle with or to hold hands with. It’s just weird. 

        I found a pair of his shorts in my closet. I knew I had them but when I took him his stuff back I couldn’t find them. I picked them up and smelled them and God did I miss his smell.