It takes me a whole class to finish up the cafeteria and I needed to go to my last class. When I walk out the doors there are people in crowds gathering around the girl's bathroom. I walk over to someone and ask what was going on.
"One of the girls tried to kill themselves because she thought she wasn't good enough because her boyfriend broke up with her"
I shake my head and walk away from that big crowd for 2 reasons, one I hate big crowds and two I can't be over there when that happens I'm not good with people dieing or to be specific people taking their own life. My eyes start to water at the thought of it I go over to the wall and sit down. I put my head down and started to silently cry over everything, about Marcus, about that girl, about me, and my mom. I get up and start walking to my last class of art, which I'm happy about because it ke the only thing I'm good at. I try to avoid Marcus as much as possible, I see Sam so I walk over there with my hands in my pocket and my head looking at my shoes. She's talking to Marcus and I just stand there waiting for them to finish talking. They stop talking to each other and I look up and see them looking at me.
"What did I interrupt you guys"
" no, it just you are really quiet," sam says
"I just don't have anything to say and I'm not really in the mood right now"
Marcus knows what I'm talking about and shakes his head and walks away. I look back at Sam,
"you know don't you"
"yea I saw them at lunch"
"I'm sorry Ashley"
"It is good you know, I don't really care"
I do care actually I like Marcus I never actually felt this way bout anybody and I felt crushed but I don't say a word. I turn around and walked to class. A couple of minutes into class and the door had opened. Everyone turned around and we saw Mary and Marcus walking in holding hands. Mary looks at me and gives me a cold smile and mouths something to me. I know what she said and I was just tired of it I get up out of my seat and walk out of class. I was tired of mary I was tired of myself at this point I'm tired of everything. I go to the place I always go to when I am having a hard time. I sit down and sit there not doing anything, I'm not crying because of what's the point. I just needed some air from in that classroom. I get up and start to walk back to class. I see Tyler, he walks towards me and grabs my hand and we start to walk the other way.
"Tyler what's up"
"I need to talk to you"
We go to the spot I was just at and he just looks at me,
"Tyler what did you want to talk about"
"You have been acting different lately what is bothering you"
"What do you think Tyler, let see tomorrows when my mom died, and also my friend is now dating his ex-girlfriend again, you see there's a lot of things that are going on right now, and not being able to talk to someone about my feelings and keeping them bottled up like this is even worse, there's a lot of things wrong with me right now."
"Ashley you can talk to me you know"
"Yeah just like I did last time and you ended up leaving a week later. You were the only one I had before my mom died, my dad was drunk all the time and you knew that and you left, and what is worse you never even told me you were leaving I found out from your dad who also didn't even know you left Tyler, so no I can't talk to you because I don't know when you gonna get your things again and just leave without telling anyone."
"Ashley the reason I left was that I didn't want to hurt you"
"How could you have hurt me"
"Because I love you Ashley and the more I spent with you my feelings got stronger and I knew, in the end, I would hurt you"
"You hurt me when you left Tyler"
"I know and I'm sorry Ashley please forgive me"
I put my head down and he picks my head back up
"Ashley I still love you I tried moving on but I couldn't it was always you and it still is, I love you Ashley"
I hug him tight and start to cry.
"You won't leave me again Tyler"
He leans in and kisses me, "I promise I won't leave you Ashley"
He kisses me again then grabs my hand and walks me back to my class. I open the door and see the teacher looking at me with a worried look, I smile at her and she smiles back and does her work. I walk over to where Sam is and see Marcus sitting there looks like the teacher won't let him sit with his girlfriend.
"Why are you smiling so much, first you were all sad and depressed and you look like someone just kissed you"
"That's because someone did"
I see Marcus's head shoot up but I ignore it and look at my work. Sam wouldn't stop bugging me and asking who kissed me.
"Ashleeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, who was it"
"Tyler" I whisper so only she can hear me
"What!!!!!!! I need to talk to that fart!"
The whole class starts to laugh even the teacher, I look at her like she's crazy.
"no, you can't your the only one who knows, and keep your mouth shut"
She pretends to zip her mouth and throws away the key. I see Marcus get up and ask the teacher something he puts a paper on my desk and Sam takes it and looks at it. I grab the note from her and read "can we talk"
I look at Sam and she shrugged her shoulders and goes back to her work. I get up and looked at the teacher and she shook her head, yes and I walk out of the class. Marcus is standing outside of the glass door.
"Ashley, are you really dating Tyler"
"Why do I have to tell you who I date now, you never told me about mary."
He stands there quietly,
"I'm sorry Marcuse bit it's my life and I can do what I want"
I turn around and walk back into class. He comes in 5 minutes later and sits down at his desk. The rest of the class went by fast the teacher let us do whatever the last 20 minutes of class and the whole time Sam was teasing me.
