So, part 100 is a vent, huh? Too bad, I needed to get this out.
Sorry, but I really need to vent here. This is stupid; my family doesn't understand me so I find strangers who do. I don't know how hard it is to realize that you're depressed or need help but I found out just recently and the realization hit me like a truck. I don't know how hard it is to realize that your OWN CHILD may actually be hurting inside and looking for someone to listen to them instead of looking for attention because apparently, that's all I can do. So apparently, cutting open my arms is seeking attention. Trying to kill yourself and crying yourself to sleep is all for attention. Because asking people to listen until you have to tell them is seeking attention. ALL I EVER DO IS LOOK FOR ATTENTION. IS THAT HOW IT IS?? IS ME BEING DEPRESSED AND HURT AND HOPING FOR SOMEONE TO UNDERSTAND AT LEAST ONE THING ABOUT ME ALL JUST FOR ATTENTION? SAYING "Oh, it's just a papercut." FOR ATTENTION?? IS LYING ABOUT CUTTING MYSELF AND HATING MYSELF FOR ATTENTION?? I LIE ABOUT LOVING MYSELF. I LIE ABOUT FEELING HAPPY. I LIE ABOUT ALL OF THAT. All I ever wanted was for someone to listen, and I can't even have THAT. I force myself to eat, for fu(n)ks sake. Sorry for posting this.
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AvA Oneshots, Character Descriptions, and Ideas
FanfictionHey there, F R e n d O s . I decided to make this book so I could get out my ideas, headcanons, and more. I do not own these characters, the owner is Alan Becker. HahHa that c0ver thO
