D&D Journals [Cynde] Plague and Penitence

Day 272

I am scared. Terrified actually. But why? There is nothing to fear.

NO! There is something to fear...but it's difficult to remember what it is. I need to write it down so that if I forget, I can remind myself.

But what's the point in even writing a journal?

I want to write in my journal! My journal! I have reasons for it. It is what I have done since I was a child. Memories are important. I need to remember it all. There is danger in forgetting.

But forgetting is why I sought the orb of knowledge in the first place. And it was found! Cora found it, but she was pulled away before she could take it. She was lost in the realm of Pandemonium. We can feel glimpses of that place, now that she has joined us. It's a terrible place. She was nearly driven mad from the screams.

Screams screams screams scr

I am alive. I am me. Those memories are not my own. One two three four. Four fingers. I am me.

What happened? I was writing this entry when I suddenly lapsed into the last moments of those death screams, I felt them through Cora, I felt the death of each one. One two three four. Four fingers.

Focus!

I am me. I am more than me. But I am still me, I am not lost. Not yet.

Focus, damn you!

Recount memories. Write them down. Do not forget. I will not forget.

I was on the airship with Tordek. Tordek was also in Pandemonium at one point. He resisted us, but if we can collect him, perhaps his mind can help us return to the orb. The orb will help us in our great cause.

Focus!

I was on the airship and we were in a volcano and it was erupting. That was the cause of the smoke, the choking smoke. I finally slept in a sealed room. It was nice and much needed. When I awoke, Tordek and I went to survey they damage of the airship. We found a room full of crates and thought there might be some supplies within that could aid us. But then I saw the Goblin commentator from the arena and I felt a surge of pure rage and hatred. I wanted to kill him, but I wanted to make him suffer before I let him die.

I tore his knee apart with an arrow. He screamed and begged for his life. I should have laughed, I should have shown him what it felt like to be laughed at while suffering.

But Tordek stopped me. He grabbed my bow and I struggled against his strength. The commentator used the distraction to slice my stomach open with a dagger before limping away. Thankfully Tordek healed me with magic, but I was so angry at him. I launched myself at him, but I was no match for his strength. He slapped me onto my back like I was a petulant child.

Perhaps I needed that. My rage ebbed away and his pleas made sense; we needed everyone to work together if we were going to somehow find a way out of the mess and survive. But I wasn't a fool anymore. No matter what a Goblin did to help, I knew they'd eventually betray us. They'd all be better off dead. If I was still back on that ship, I would I have found a way to save the two of us and let the Goblins burn in that volcano.

But that was around when I made the best mistake of my life. No. I meant to write "great". No! It was the worst mistake. But it wasn't all bad.

Stop it!

It was terrible. I am me. I am me. One two three four. Four fingers.

The crates in that room were full of fairies trapped in jars. Tordek freed one that looked the most innocent of them all and it turned out to be Oo'gra'deeth's fairy! When we told her that Oo'gra'deeth had formed a cocoon around himself, she lost her mind. According to her, that meant his ethereal form left his body. She began muttering about finding the fairy held by the Goblin King because it might be able to send her back in time to when we were all in the forest and she was happy with Oo'gra'deeth. She became unresponsive then and we couldn't get any help from her.