The moon child

The Dream

I'm there again, in the lulling scenery that has haunted me lately. I am by the lake, the lake is just what I called it. Though I'm sure others would call it a pond in some cases, nevertheless, the lake looks utterly exquisite with the growing meadow. That's weird. There's no meadow in the one that I occasionally attend to, right? There are wildflowers but this is a full-on developing meadow. My head pound, stopping me from thinking of anything else except for wherever I'm. What time is it by the way? I've never seen the lake quite this stunning at any given time. Is it morning? Oddly, the weather is not cold, so it must have been near afternoon. Howbeit, the streak of soft rays on my eyes, and the fresh crisp air too are suspicious. It's so bright, and yet the intensity does not hurt my eyes, I've never seen it this dazzling if I must recall. Nearing the bank, I brave myself to trouble the water on the lake. The deep lake sways a little from the stir of my fingers. Delicate upon the stream of still water. This feels like... It feels warm. Warmer than in real life.

That is it. I've figured it out now. I'm dreaming, however, I don't want to wake up... Maybe if I pretend not to notice I'll stay here a little longer?

Just as I finished my thoughts a melancholy deep howl comes from across the lake. At the other side of the woods. I look up alarmed, I'm now noticeably terrified and shaking. Wasn't I just feeling a tiny bit calm? An unexpected sigh escapes my lips. I am a little annoyed and pissed off now. Why does it have to make such sounds?

Again, my thoughts were interrupted as something appears from the woods.

What is that? A gleaming luster. So small. No wait, the lights gleam from afar. It gets brighter and brighter! It won't stop! I squint my eyes, trying to see through the ablaze luminosity. Why is the light so outstandingly tempting though? The intensity burning my eyes now, making its water. Yet, there is this strong urge of desire to be swallowed by it... Surely this sinful coax must be wrong? Is it false if I'm in a dream, where I have no control? Maybe not.
But deep down, in my heart, it strangely feels like it's my choice. Shall I follow the tempting, even if it's bad? I shouldn't. Why is it that we know something is bad for us, and that's when we are so brave to go for it? When all our life we have been playing safe. The risk, maybe. Making us feel alive.

Without my consent, I am already walking towards the source of blinding light. I had an urgent feeling that I must reach there, now more than ever. As if now that I've made my choice, I can never go back now. Or else I will die from the drunkenness I am feeling at this moment. One-step and a step closer. The light produced a calling voice, making me shudder and the once warm weather is icy winter, the cold seeping in my bones. This is just a dream. Remember this, or you'll never make it out. The next step I took, however, wasn't on a solid surface anymore.

Oh no, the lake! I've not realized there are boundaries separating us. I'm such a fool! Too late now, it all becomes slow motion. My left leg had sunk in the lake, making my whole body followed the pull of gravity. Swallowed.

NO!

A jerk. I woke up with a jerk feeling distinctly disoriented. I still remember vividly the wetness of the lake, so warm yet so unwelcome. And the haunting, dangerous source of light. I reach my hand to my damp chest, detecting a trailing bizarre deep sense of longing. Clinging onto me so tightly making me want to cry and weep from this cavernous affection. I feel empty as if I lost a piece of myself. No, it's as if I remember now a piece of me that is missing. What am I bluffing about, this is probably because pieces of me are flying away and I certainly did not blame them. Certainly, it will be nice if they took my whole soul with them.

Trying to gain my tranquility back, I wipe down my face. Taking a few deep breaths, even though it does not help with this unusual trail of yearning.