Born For This

Born For This (part 1)

As soon as I saw him, my heart skipped a beat. Seeing his beautiful dark brown eyes in the shining sun just made me want more. I wanted to touch his skin. I wanted to run my fingers through his soft brown hair. I resisted that strong urge as I made my way to class. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. How could one man be so sweet to me? How could he be so simply kind? Loving? I’d never met someone like him before. From the start, I knew I needed him in my life, forever; I’d just never planned for it to be exactly like this.

I walked into class and took my usual spot in the front row.  Unlike the other students, I preferred this spot. I did not need to talk to anyone, I just wanted to stare out the door and watch the people go by. Some waved in the window and made me giggle. But most importantly sometimes you would walk by, and I would smile in hopes that you would see me sitting there. Maybe you’d look in the window, see me, and smile back. Then that smile would make you think you loved me, too. And hell, maybe you’d open the door and say, “Olivia, I love you.” This was only a dream. A dream I knew would never come true, but something close to that did.

You entered the room, walked right passed me, like I was completely invisible. I watched you as you walked to the teacher and talked to her for awhile. I think I heard something about this being you’re new class due to a schedule change. Then she pointed to a desk, right next to mine. You turned around walked towards the desk and took your new spot. Right next to me. I couldn’t help but smile, for in my head I was screaming. This was my chance. I could get this boy to notice me. I looked over my shoulder to see if he was looking at me. He wasn’t, yet.  What could I do to make him see me? I could pretend to sneeze. Yes! I could sneeze, a really cute sneeze. He’d look at me, say Bless you, and realize it was me and tell me I had a cute sneeze. Then we’ll go into some deeps conversation and he’ll realize he likes me too. Maybe then he’d ask me out and we’d live happily ever after.

Then I sneezed.

Not the sneeze I planned though. A real sneeze. One of my obnoxiously loud sneezes where everyone in the entire room stares at me thinking what the hell is wrong with me. On the bright side it did make him notice me. He sort of looked to his left with an odd look on his face, then realized it was me and said, “Was that you, Olivia?”

My face flushed red. I mumble a soft, “yes” and turned away. That was not how I wanted that to go at all. How could I be so stupid? My terrible sneeze probably just made him scarred and now he’ll never talk to me. God, I’m so stupid.

I put my head down and let the next minute of this class fly by. He never said a word to me after that, let alone looked at me once. When the bell finally rang he wasn’t nearly ready to leave so I left in a hurry to get away from him and the possible mocking of his friends. As if I couldn’t get anymore embarrassing, I ran into the side of the door on my way out. I heard the snickering of my classmates, flushed with red again, and ran out to the bathroom.

How embarrassing! I just humiliated myself in front of my entire class not only once, but twice. Why do I have to be so clumsy? Running into a door like that, now he must think there is something mentally wrong with me. I can’t show my face to that class ever again.

I ran out of the bathroom in a hurry and ran right into him, dropping all of my books on his foot, “I’m so sorry, Steven”

He bent down and picked them up and replied, “It’s alright”