broken in pompeii

#1 Stormer

January 30th 2015 and its 9.27 at night, I am lying in bed watching Bastille live at sziget (my favorite concert that they have done) I watch this concert every...single...night. I love it so much, I love them so much. I am sat here thinking about everything: about school, exams, dance, boys, just everything. I realize how stressed out I am about school and my dance exam that is coming up. I then pause the concert and have a real hard think... I start crying...I don't know why I am crying this much but I am. I start to calm down and play Bastille again, but I see Dan put on his grey jacket on and I start crying again, but this time I know why, Dan is about to sing flaws and go into the audience and i always break down watching it because i am not there being centimeters away from the love of my life. After the concert has finished I go to sleep and once again i dream about meeting my idols.

The next day i was in a really bad mood, for several reasons:

It was a Monday

I had school

I had had a big argument with my mum earlier that morning

And I can't meet my idols.

So I am walking round school and I feel like I dont belong with the people I go round with, they don't listen to the bands i listen to, they dont understand fangirling, they dont have tumblr or admire musicians or do dance, they dont do anything, they are everything I am not.

Its lunch time and i am sat with my earphones in listening to All This Bad Blood album whilst they are sat in silence playing some game on there phone. I get too bored and start looking through Instagram on my Bastille account.

I go home, go to my room and start crying. Today was shit. Nothing happened, shit.

I have such a boring life, urgh.

It's also my birthday if i havnt told you already, January 31st, its tomorrow! :)

My mum said she has got me something very special and big but i argued with her this morning and she threatened to give it away.

I dont think she will though she said I will love it and she wouldnt do anything to make me unhappy :)

So I skip dinner and go straight to bed. I just want it to be my birthday.

January 30th 2015, 7.00 a.m.

Its my birthday whoop!

it doesn't sound like i'm excited but trust me I am its just too early.

I make my way downstairs and my mum is sat there on the couch and in front of her is a long shaped card and one wrapped present.

In my mind was "Is that all she has got me? One present and a card? Im not being a brat but I am an only child and we are not poor? I am so confused?"

So i pretend to look happy just for my mum and i open the present first and in it was a Bastille t-shirt, 5sos t-shirt and a Mcbusted t-shirt (my mum knows me well) I thank her for the t-shirts and go for the card. Just as i was about to open my card my mum said "please contain your excitement" I was confused.

I opened it, oh my god, I couldn't believe it. I wasn't breathing, I was crying, I couldn't control any of it. I started shaking, I couldn't take it oh my god. They were Bastille tickets...but not just any... with these tickets i can get into the place earlier than everyone else so i can get to the front, omfg i am not breathing, i collapse.

I literally couldn't speak for hours, my mum kept asking if I was okay, i just looked at her in tears as if to say " does it look like i'm okay?".

I just couldn't believe it.