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Harry’s POV:
“Whatever,” Niall mumbled at me. I just sat there wondering what happened to him. I rested my head on my hands and looked up at him.
“Ni, why won’t you tell me anything?”
“Because you never cared before” Did he really just say that? Ughhhhhh….I know I’m not always there because Liam always butts in, but I do care, I care about him a lot.
“I do care you just never gave me the chance”
“No you don’t. Plus I didn’t hide it until it got worse”
“Why are you doing this to yourself” I looked closely at him and saw tears starting to form in his eyes. He shook his head and looked at the floor. “I’m not doing anything, nothing worth anything” Was all I got out of him for a good ten minutes.
“Nialler why, why do you think the way you do, why are you cutting yourself?”
“Because”
“Because, why”
He finally snapped at me. “Why do you care about me now?”
“I’ve always cared for you Niall”
“I’m not worth it Harry, I’m not worth it to anybody, I’m a worthless use of space that’s not wanted” I looked up at him to see tears streaming down his face. He looked so broken, so hopeless. I just can’t understand why this happens to him, why he is just so stubborn to realize people want him, he’s not worthless, he belongs on this planet like everyone else. I got up off the floor and sat down next to him engulfing him in a hug. He climbed into my lap and curled up into a ball staining my shirt of tear but I didn’t care. I wanted him to know somebody did love him. “You are an amazing person, you are the life of the party, without you the parties are always boring, heck everything is boring without you, I can find a million people who love you.” He sat there and shook his head. He finally pulled out his phone, opened twitter and shoved it in my face.
“Really, then tell me why I get this” I looked at his phone read a couple things, then took his phone a chucked it at the wall. Surprisingly it didn’t break. “Niall we have told you countless of times not to listen to them, all they are is jealous, jealous that they can’t be a fun loving care free mofo like you.” “It doesn’t matter, I don’t matter.” “yes it does, you matter a lot to me” He shrugged his shoulders and looked I at me dead in the eye and told me I shouldn’t. That hit me hard. It broke me to pieces that he would think this. “Get every one of those thoughts out of your head NOW, nothing is true what they say about you, and I should care” “My parents disowned me Harry. Obviously I’m not worth it.” “You told me you were gay down there did I disown you? NO, Im sitting here right beside you, your parents will come through I promise” He shook his head at me again and started crying even harder. He told me tht it has been three years since they disowned him. They did it right as they suspected it. What kind of parent would do that? That only hurts the child and we get kids like Niall, feeling worthless and feeling like nobody loves him anymore or cares about him. I finally figured out why he never wanted to go home when we’re in Ireland. It all makes sense now. I feel so bad for him, I love him and he’s such a great person, why did they have to break him? Heck, when I told my mother that I was bi she sat in silence looking into her tea for a good ten minutes. I was terrified, but she finally looked at me with a smile and told me she was glad I told her and even if I married a girl or a guy she would be happy for me no matter what. She would be there for me always. That’s what a mother should do, that’s what parents should do, instead of completely disowning their child. I was brought out of my thoughts when Niall buried his head into my neck and told me he can’t just forget about his family.
“I know, I know you never will, but if they aren’t going to be there for you I just want you to know I’ll be here for you no matter what and I know the boy will too and so will our families.”
“thank you Haz” He looked up at me a smiled a little.
“Promise me one thing though”
“Depends on what it is”
“Promise me you’ll never do this again.” I looked into his eyes while lifting up his wrists and rolling the sleeves up.
He looked away quickly he told me he couldn’t promise that. I told him that he better promise or I wasn’t letting go of him. Again he told me he couldn’t, and added that he’s been doing it since he was eight, he couldn’t just stop. I rubbed his back and he started getting tired.
“You tired Nialler?” I asked him and he nodded.
“I don’t wanna move” I laughed a little at his childish manner. “You can’t sleep in my lap forever” “Why not?” “Because I’ll uncomfortable and my back will be killing me in the morning and I’m afraid I’ll fall asleep and fall, I don’t want to hurt you.” He just smiled and nuzzled more into my neck. I took the chance to grab him bridal style and get up. He wrapped his arms around my neck as I walked into the bathroom. I placed him on the counter and went to go brush my teeth but he held on tighter. “Ni, I gotta brush my teeth” He legit started pouting at me. He is just so darn cute when he does that, it’s so hard not to lean in a kiss him on the lips. “Oh stop pouting it’ll only take a second and then you can hang on me again” I told him. He finally released pouting an even cuter pout and crossed his arms. Gahhh…Harry stop starring and brush your teeth. I quickly brushed my teeth and moved back in front of Niall letting him wrap his arms around my neck again and climbing back into my embrace. I walked us over to the bed and laid us both down with him snuggled up to me, resting on my chest. I said goodnight to him and closed my eyes to go to sleep. Not even a second later I felt Niall poking my nose. “What Ni?” I said not opening my eyes. “Nothing, goodnight cuddlebear.” He put his arm down and I smiled at the nickname. Right as I’m about to fall asleep I feel him poke my nose again. “cut it out mister”
“Not uh”
“Yes huhh”
“Nope”
I grabbed a hold of his finger. “Yes, I’m trying to sleep, I’ve had a rough day and we have to get up early” I released his finger.
“How early”
“Seven, but if you behave I’ll make it eight”
“Eight is still early and not enough sleep for me”
“I know, but if we don’t get up Liam will come in here and be all Daddy Direction on us”
“I’ll pout and get out of it, going but LiLiiiiiii and I give him the puppy dog eyes and he goes gets me clothes and lets me sleep longer” He said this in an adorable little kids voice. He’s such a little devil but that won’t help my case and plus Liam and Louis will bug me until I die, wondering why Niall was sleeping with me all night. He poked me one more time on the nose and then curled up into me whispering a “night, night Hazzabear.” I kissed the top of his head and said “night, night Niallerbear” and let sleep over take me finally.
