Heartbeat

Part One

He watches as Mew slept on the bed, swamped by the white sheets, hooked up on an IV, a bag of MVI (multi vitamin infusion) running thru the pump, his other hand covered with the cuff attached to the BP machine next to his bed. He hated it, hated every bit of it. 

He knew it was a necessity and he was relieved that his Phi was sleeping and getting the much needed nutrients, but he hated the reason behind all of this. He knew this was going to happen sooner or later, but not to this extent. The man didn't know the meaning of exhaustion, running on pure adrenaline till his body gave out. Well, he can't say so much for himself, but at the rate Mew had been going, non stop schedule for a few months, his body was bound to rebel. And he hated the fact that this was not the first time exhaustion has landed the man in hospital this year.

Gulf sighs and runs his hands thru his hair again, ruffling thru the already messy locks. He rubs at his eyes, blinking again as he feels the grit and dryness pull at the corners. He could feel that deep ache settling into his body, making him aware of how cold he feels and the occassional shivers that wrack his body. Not to mention the fluttering feel in his chest. But nothing could compare to the emotional turmoil that was going inside of him. Anxiety and worry gnawing at his very being.

"Luk," a gentle hand taps on his shoulder and he looks up to see Mama J standing beside him, a small smile on her face. He was so lost in thought that he hadn't even notice her coming into the room. "You should go home and rest, Luk. Mama will stay here for the night with Mew."

Gulf merely shook his head. "No, Mama. Gulf wants to stay here and help you."

She gently smoothens out his hair, the smile never leaving her face. "He is asleep and the nurses will help me if I need anything. You need rest too, Luk. What would Mew say if he knows his beloved Tua Eng is here and not looking after himself."

"But Ma-"

"My dearest Saphai, please listen to Mama na. You don't want your Mae to worry about you too, no? Besides, Best told me you still have to attend the event tomorrow despite Mew not being there. You need the rest, Luk. You're basically carrying Mew with you on your shoulders tomorrow. You need the strength" Gulf looks somewhat hesitant for a second, before relenting. He knows he can never win against Mama J and so he nods, slowly getting to his feet and makes his way to Mew's bed.

Gulf brushed the grey locks from Mew's face, the small act causing Mew to shift a little in his sleep. He leans down and presses a gentle kiss on Mew's forehead, taking in the sleeping man's features, heart clenching at the paleness and subtle frown between his lover's brows. He sighs as he brushes Mew's cheek with his finger. "Sleep tight and rest well, Tirak" he whispers before pressing one last kiss and straightens up.

The shift in gravity made him feel blood rushing down from his head and he sways momentarily, vision swimming, hands gripping on to the bed railing tight to keep him upright. It lasted only a second and he let out a shaky exhale, daring a look at Mama J, hoping that she did not notice. And even if she did, she didn't say anything. He stands still till the pounding in his head and his heart somewhat lessens before turning to her.

"I'll take my leave now, Mama." He wai-ed to Mama J and was about to leave the room when he suddenly turned around. "Mama, can you just, not tell P'Mew I was here tonight."

The older woman looked at him with her eyebrows raised. "Why?"

"I don't want him to worry about me being here till so late at night. I will just text him, krub." He explained.

She nodded in understanding and he wai-ed again and left. She let out a sigh and took a seat on the sofa near her son's bed. She had seen how tired Mew was and she knew her stubborn son was bound to force himself till his body couldn't take it. But what concerns her more was that his behaviour was rubbing off on her saphai too. She wasn't blind to the younger boy's pale skin, the eye bags underneath his eyes, how thin he had become. If she were honest to herself, he looked worse off than her son.

Mae T had voiced out her worries to her a few weeks ago, and being mothers, they can't help but worry for their sons. They had discussed how best to help the boys further but it felt like they were both fighting a losing battle. She felt for Mae T, what with Gulf having fallen ill right before his graduation, to Grace being hospitalised for dengue the night of Gulf's graduation day. Easy to say the Traipipattanapong family was going thru a rough patch.

Her heart clenches at the sight of her sleeping son, lying on the hospital bed. He had felt a little faint after his photoshoot, and he had been the one who asked his Stu to send him to the hospital straight. Somewhere deep inside her, she was somewhat grateful that her son knew how to ask for help when he needed it. But what about Gulf?

She knows how quiet the boy is, and she had seen how much quieter he had become when he had fallen ill a few weeks back. It  took quite a lot of forcing from Mae T to get him to rest and take medication. Her mind suddenly threw an image of Gulf, holding on to her son's bed rail not a few moments ago, face flushed for a split second. Call it a mother's instincts, but something did not sit right.

Mama J took out her phone and shoots a text to N'Stu. "Please go and accompany Khun Nong and P'Best tomorrow. I will work with the other Stu in your absence."

She then texts Mae T, telling her that Gulf had left the hospital and to just inform her of he has arrived home. But something is still is bothering her, and it was further reinforced when she received a reply text. "If you make merit tomorrow morning, could you please include Gulf as well?" Again, her instincts kick in. Mae T has never asked in that way in the time that they had known each other. Why it this request sound so serious? Is something about to happen?

What exactly was this foreboding feeling?