(WARNING: I'm so fucking bad at grammar-- Let's just pretend like I did it right shhh) (not edited, this made for my vocabulary essay lmao)
Forever wandering this forest, the land I was banished from just out of reach. Gloomy, dark, and dissociative. Barricades of trees surround the exterior, no one ever enters. No one ever leaves. The air is always brackish and the aura never falters from apprehensive. I am trapped in this forest and known only as a monster. If only I wasn’t cursed with existence. If only I hadn’t cared. Why did I choose to be attentive? We cared for each other, didn’t we? So why did you do it? Leading us along just to come out as an adversary, why? What was the reason? Why do I still care? It’s pointless. I am chained to the woodlands, forever and always. Everything is pointless. I don’t care what happens anymore. I remain indifferent when the rabbits cheer my fears. My face stays unfazed as the deers chant my mistakes. I already know what I’ve done. I already know I can't go back.
Denial is an ethereal killer. It distracts you with beautiful lies as it slowly stabs you in the front. Piercing you with its blade, you fall victim to the false reality it’s creating just for you. Funny enough, that’s exactly what you did to me. You used handsome words to distract me from what you were really doing; who you really were. I can’t believe how blind I was. Despite all this, I still long for you. For someone, anyone.
A beast of this forest can never leave, but that doesn’t mean the desire never appears. The desire that never goes away. Hope loves to tease me from time to time. It cruelly convinces me I can get better, I can overcome this, only to be slapped in the face with a reminder of these shackles. I can never leave. These chains are too strong, the fog is too thick, my mind is too weak.
The rabbits who cheer my fears, the deers who chant my mistakes, and the birds who sing my failures. I am forever stuck with myself and these animals. I am tortured day by day seeing you roam utopia, just out of reach. You haven’t changed. You never cared. You were just lying and I foolishly believed every word.
