Hannah

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Dear Diary,
I think I'm in love. I keep seeing the same person in my head. I want to say his name, and write it down 100 times. Spencer, Spencer, Spenc...

I was stopped by my mother. All she did was tap me on the shoulder, and made me drop my pen. It was my lucky pen, so I was annoyed.
"Hannah! What are you doing? What's all this you've been scribbling? Come on, time for school,"
"I was just... writing. About nothing. Nothing at all. Nothing to worry about. Oh, has Dad called?" I asked hopefully. I loved my dad way more than my mum. But unfortunately, when my parents divorced, I wasn't able to pick who I lived with.

I left the house, and hoped that Spencer would be there. Even though I loved him, he certainly hated me. I walked to the end of Oak Drive, and went into the house on the end. It was all dressed up in colourful lights and tinsel on the windowsill on the inside. I knocked on the door, which had a wreath that was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. As it was our Christmas party this afternoon at school, the wealthy girl that lived inside, also know as my best friend, Ellery, had a new dress. It was a red dress, and had a white, fluffy hem at the bottom, making her look like Santa Claus, but in a good way. I never really bothered with my own clothes. Today, I'd chosen a grey hoodie that simply read 'Merry Christmas ' on the front, topped off with my denim jeans, which had more holes in them than fabric. I heard someone coming, and it was Ellery's mum, Natalia. The reason that my best friend is one of the most gorgeous girls that I've ever seen, is because her mum is Polish. She grew up in Poland, and moved here when she was 17. When Ellery and I first met, she had a very thick accent that I couldn't always understand. The more time I spent with Ellery, the more I got used to her mum. Ellery has honey hair, and the deepest brown eyes. Her hair was always curly, and it was caramel. I always thought that she looked like Mariah Carey. Natalia was wearing a soft leopard print jacket, with no sleeves. She was dancing away to a Kelly Clarkson Christmas song. Her face lit up when she saw me,
"Hi, Hannah. Come on in and wait. Ellery will be ready in a minute,"

Once Ellery was ready, we set off for school. I told her all about Spencer. I told her that I had a huge crush on him, and I wanted him so badly. Ellery put on her thinking face.
"Well, I think you should let him go. Boys aren't everything,"
" Says you! You're so beautiful, you could wrap any boy around your little finger, " I said, giving her a slight shove. She squealed, and fell over.
"OMG HANNAH! THIS IS A BRAND NEW DRESS, AND IT'S ALL DIRTY NOW! I'm gonna have to go back home and change. Again," She said angrily. Ellery turned around to go back home, but I stopped her.
" You can't go back home, you'll be late for school. So, what about my problem? " I persisted.
"Well, boys will be boys. You can't get them to do everything. Remember Spencer back in primary? He was so mean. He called you all those names, and made extremely rude gestures, stuff that no 6 year olds should have been exposed to,"
"But that was 9 years ago. We're 15 now. We are expected to be dating. Everyone else has a partner,"
" I don't, " Ellery replied, "And who wants to be like everyone else? It'd get boring,"

We got to school, and went into the playground. We go to a school that is an actual dump. There is a fence made out of barbed wire. It used to be wood, but it collapsed a few years ago, so we replaced it with wire. We have no benches, so if people's lunches get dirty, then that's that. Our canteen isn't much better. The women that work in there are so rude. The food tastes like crap, as they don't wash their hands before handling it. I looked to my right, and saw Spencer. He was with Finley and Arthur, his two best friends. He smiled at Ellery, and walked over. He ignored me, but complimented her dress. The bell went, and we all rushed to our classes. On our way to Science, Ellery and I discussed things between me and Spencer.
"Well, what do you want to do, Hannah?" She asked.
"I think I should just avoid him until I can let him go," I told her, completing forgetting that we were in S12 today, where I have to sit next to Spencer! I told myself to stay calm. Just don't talk to him, don't make eye contact. We walked in and sat down. Our teacher, Mr Phelps, called the register. He read out a few names, before he got to me.
"Hannah Fischer?"
"Here, sir," I said, knowing that Spencer's name was next. I did not need someone putting our names together. Once he'd done the register, we got on with a practical. We needed a few worksheets handed out, and Sir spun the wheel. He has an online wheel that he spins when he needs volunteers. You do it whether you like it or not. He spun my name, and Spencer. Oh, great! I handed out the sheets. When I gave one to Ellery, she gestured for me to bend down.
"Just stay away from him. Don't dance with him this afternoon, don't talk to him. If he talks to you, just ignore him," She whispered.

Dear Diary,
I think Ellery is right. I think the best thing to do is what she says. I'm confused. I don't know what to do.

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