Ricky climbed the stairs and slid the door open. The air from the hallway came fresh upon his face. He stepped through and slowly slid the door behind him.
The door came to rest on a plastic stopper, designed to allow some of the heat from the glowing fire downstairs to travel to the rooms above.
The hall had momentarily been filled with brightness. As the door retracted, so did the light. The clear form of a twisted willow branch in a large vase transformed from an intriguing feature into something far more menacing. It was given life in its increasing ambiguity. A slither of light was left plastered vertically up the wall.
He could still hear the TV downstairs. His family were nestled in front of it watching the Hobbit. He didn't want to leave, but was busting to go to the bathroom.
The stark contrast between the strip of light and the endless black beyond it made his body quiver.
Ricky could have turned on the lights and brought the hallway out from the shadows. In fact, his right index finger rested upon the switch. But he didn't flick it. There was something about the rising fear that he wanted to face. It's not that he felt brave, he was still petrified. It took every bit of his resolve not to fill the darkness with light.
It was not the first time he had tested himself in the night. Usually, he gave in quickly and allowed visible borders to descend upon the void.
The absence of shapes and lack of depth perception played on his mind. It was pitch black beyond him. The walls and doors could not be defined - he knew they were there - but something in the blackness made him question what he knew!
Perhaps- he thought - perhaps it was possible that the dark had erased what he knew as the hallway. Maybe it had swallowed it and before him lay a new universe. An endless universe filled with all things that thrive when not seen.
Ricky shook his head and tried to rationalise his thoughts. He brought the hallway that he knew to mind. He could see it in his head. It was about ten metres long. The stairs brought him to within a few steps of the southern end - but even that could not be seen now.
He visualised walking the hall. Heading to the northern end, he passed his father's study on the left and then onto an archway recessed in the left-hand wall. He turned under the arch and walked a few metres more. Reaching the bathroom - his goal.
"Oi, are you going to just stand at the door, or are you doing something?" His 11-year-old older brother's voice had a hint of playfulness.
"I'm just trying to build up the courage to leave the warmth," Ricky said.
"The quicker you go, the quicker you can be back next to the fire - you're missing the good stuff."
Ricky had told the truth about building courage, but it wasn't just the cold he was afraid of. He took a deep breath and stepped into the shadows. All his body wanted to turn back. Each step seemed to cloak his soul further in fear. Still, he moved on. He passed where he thought his father's study to be. Thinking of the empty room beside him did nothing to still his anxiety. His body was on high alert, waiting for something to come from the dark. He thought he must be getting close to the archway and so let his left hand reach out to trace the wall until the corner came. As his hand hit the smooth paint he took another breath, happy to find some safety in the solid and material nature of it.
A red light blinked on in the darkness, momentarily paralysing him. He knew it was just a motion sensor for the alarm. He knew it would do nothing as the alarm was switched off. None the less his body tensed, waiting for that blasting sound. Of course, it never came.
The red light, suspended in the black beyond, pierced the night. It was like one single evil eye staring straight at Ricky. His heart beat became stronger in his chest. His hands grew sweaty. He tried to rationalize it - but instinct won out. He unfroze only to allow himself to turn on his heels and rush back towards the light.
As he went, it felt like turning his back had made him more susceptible to the evil that he innately feared dwelt in the far regions of the dark hall. His pace quickened, his panic increased. He hoped some sinister force would not grab him and drag him into the abyss forever. He let his left hand run along the wall until he felt the rise of the light switch. The -click- was the sweetest sound. He turned to see the hall lit up and everything as normal. The light showed there was nothing to fear. Yet still he felt uneasy.
Ricky had frightened himself out of any need to go to the toilet. With no reason to be upstairs for another second, he opened the door and descended into the warmth. His family still sitting in front of the TV!
"What was all that running about?" Ricky's Dad asked. His focus was still on the TV, engrossed in a sweeping aerial shot of the Misty Mountains - Bilbo and company caught amid a colossal battle between stone giants.
Ricky didn't want to draw any more attention to what could now turn from fear to embarrassment. His father's question didn't require a logical answer, he just had to say something, anything! Silence would be his undoing. "Just escaping monsters" he found himself replying. He was surprised by the honesty of his answer.
A soft smile formed from the corner of his dad's lips but he didn't say anything else.
He felt the awkward sensation of eyes upon him as he sat close to the warmth and safety of the fire. Once on the ground he turned his face to confirm the eyes of his brother were on him. They were scanning him as if trying to pick up a hint of what had gone on upstairs.
He wondered if his brother would make a scene and embarrass him anyway. Did he know Ricky had been afraid of the dark? However, as he considered his brothers eyes he could see no mean intent - rather, they seemed to acknowledge the dissipating fear in his own. His brother's eyes returned to the TV without a word, but they softened as they did.
A strange feeling rested with him, he tried to understand what the softening had meant. The flickering light from the fire concealed any certainty, but he thought he saw himself in them. Ricky wondered if everyone was afraid of what lay in the shadows.
