The life of a self-harmer

Trapped

You will never understand,
Nor even comprehend,
How I always feel in the end.

You look and see,
But barely even try to care,
About any little inch or hair,
On my body

I inhale and exhale,
Hoping to one day stop,
And realise I'm ok.

But you still do not understand,
And cannot even comprehend,
The level of distress or agony,
In am constantly in.

You can leave and walk away,
But still I have to stay,
In this flesh that is my home,

So how do you think I feel?

I am the one trapped in this skin,
You are just a bystander looking in.

I've seen it all,
Been there for every fall,
On to my knees,
Crashed down like every stormy sea,

And still there is no calm.
I can rest on your arm,
But for how long until you realise
How much energy it takes to stay with me?

But if you can't stand the effort,
It takes to stay in love,
And care for the me who can barely love herself,
You don't deserve the me who will flourish in the sun and rain,
Who emerges from all the pain

And continues to grow,
Ignoring every single blow,
You try to throw,
And you will watch me glow,
From the beauty within me.