Take It Back

7

(From: Stupid)
Okay, look. I do not get it. What is going on? I dont get why a crush would affect a friendship. I dont get how a crush could affect our friendship. I mean, you and me. You remember how we said forever back in the days? Im so scared, Lou. I am so scared. Please tell me everythings alright and I didnt mess up..

Louis read and thought about it for a while. There were two options: Harry didnt get that Louis' crush was in fact on Harry or Harry doesnt care and still wants to be friends. Since both of the options were likely to be the true one, Louis decided to go with he one he´d rather pick: Harry doesnt care and still wants to be friends. 

(To: Stupid)
You did definalety not mess up. im sorry, dont be scared. everythings alright, and so are we. we´re fine, okay? you're right, its just a simple crush and it wont last too long for sure.

His arm hurt, so he ended the text message there. He pressed send and already felt the thunder coming up. This was way more than it looked like, and this thunderstorm surely wouldn't pass by too fast. 

Harry could't thik of anything throughout the 2 days of him not seeing Louis because he was too confused to talk. Harry not coming over made Louis feel like shit and also like Harry hated him from now on and didn't want to have to do anthing with Louis. 
Fuck, he thought while looking and the wounds. It looked unreal. His arm looked dead. 

It was Saturday evening when Harry decided to show up. Louis was scared but also longing for Harrys company.
"Hi.." Harry started. Louis had put on a sweater before so Harry wouldn't notice the cuts. 
"H-hey.." Louis couldn't talk properly.
"So.. I've been thinking.. about this.. whatever it is."
Instead of replying, Louis just nodded while biting his lip and playing with his sleeves.
"I.. Louis you need to explain because I can't seem to guess what the fuck is going on."
Louis looked up straight into Harry's eyes. "Are you serious?"
"Um, yeah, I guess?" Harry asked confused. "I thought about it all day, all night, I didn't sleep, I didn't get up, I just thought. Look, I love you and I don't want anything to destroy us."
Louis swallowed. What?
"Fuck, Louis! Look at us! I love you so much, I need you."
"..Y-you do..?"
"YES! I could never not! Hell, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me!"
"I.. I love you too.." Louis whispered and regretted immediately afterwards.
"W-wait. I.. You know that I love you. Why would you questi- oh no. No Louis, no. Please tell me it's not what I think it is."
Louis looked down again and didn't say a word. Please, please be stupid enough to not get this.

"Louis. Is it.. what I think it is?" 
and even though Harry was the slowest talker Louis'd ever met (he loved that about Harry), the words came out of his mouth too fast. He didn't have time to make up his mind on how to respond.
Louis had swallowed plenty times now and his mouth was dry.
"I don't know what you think it is." Louis finally answered, talking slow and still looking on the ground, hands into his pockets.
"I think you have a crush on me." Harry answered, too fast, too direct.
Louis paniced. Harry's not so stupid after all..
"Oh my god, I am so sorry.." Even though Harry was pretending to not have a crush on Louis, he felt the butterflies going crazy. 
"You just said you loved me, Harry. You lied. You tricked me."
I DIDN'T LIE, I DO FUCKING LOVE YOU, MORE THAN YOU THINK, OKAY?
"I'm sorry." Harry replied, trying not to cry.
"But.. I thought you.. I don't even know, it just seemed like you.." Louis eyes became watery and no matter how hard he would try to gulp down the tears, they started rolling down his red cheeks.
"I am so sorry, I didn't mean it that way.." Harry said quietly, almost whispering, his life scattering at the sight of his bestfriend, whose heart he just broke himself instead of preventing it to be broken.
Louis knees got weak and he fell down, trying to catch himself with his arm.
"FUCK!" He screamed when he felt his wounds start bleeding again.
"Are you okay?" Harry asked, bending down to help Louis up. He took Louis hand and noticed red parts on the grey sweater. They got bigger.
"No." Harry said, rolling up the sleeves.
"NO!" He screamed while looking and Louis' bleeding destroyed dead looking arm.
He sobbed and placed his hands to his eyes. Louis closed his eyes and screamed at himself in his mind.
Harry didn't speak again, he just sobbed, not daring to take a look at Louis.
"I'm so sorry," Louis whispered before drifting off. He was tired and had lost too much blood to keep awake.
"No, nononononono, don't fucking leave me now, Louis, can you hear me? I beg you, stay, stay awake, Louis!!!" Harry said while slapping Louis across the face a few times to wake him up. He failed. 
He took out his mobile phone and called Lucy. If he called 911, Louis would end up in psychiatry.

"No time to explain, you need to come to Louis', please, and bring bandages! Hurry up, it's an emergency!" Harry said and hanged up afterwards. He got up and ran to the bathroom to get a towel, and he spotted the red one in the corner. He swallowed and left to help Louis. He bandaged his arm and pressed. He still sobbed and didn't seem to ever be able to smile again.

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D R A M A
Just to let you know: I am almost crying myself writing this because LOSUIOWH LOUSILOUS 
Yours, Paula xx