slight angst with fluff
➪ FUGO PANNACOTTA: in love
in love...
such a simple feeling you couldn't seem to shake, oh your love seemed to drive you crazy in the loveliest ways.
you stayed up all night but thinking about the things that he'd say.
you and Trish were the only girls in the household, you trusted her with your life secrets.
that being said she knew about your crush on the one and only fugo.
you couldn't understand it yourself, it was nothing like your other crushes, you were head over heels for this teen.
you were the same age as Trish, though you both were the same age there was no doubt Trish was prettier. she took a great amount of pride in her appearance, you didn't care much for yours. you used to at least.
you had developed body issues thinking if you were good enough for fugo, started eating less, pushing yourself to your limit when going out often for runs.
you had just returned home from one of those runs, you were exhausted but you forced yourself to walk to your room anyways. you ignored everyone around you, that was almost anyone. on your way to your room you saw Trish and fugo talking, a pang of jealousy hit your heart but you ignored it.
it was just your mind talking. and even if he did love her, you would support them. it wasn't your place to butt in, no matter how much you loved him. Trish happened to see you walk away, she shrugged it off and went back to talking to fugo.
opening the door to your room you walk in and close it behind you, the cool air hitting your sweaty body felt nice. you walked towards your bed and collapsed on it. you turn over and looked at the ceiling.your mind was blank, an empty canvas, you drifted off into space as your hair sprawled out on your bed the back of your hand rested on your forehead, you had a straight face as time passes you by.
that was until someone entered your room. you turned your head to look at who it was, it was Trish. you lay your head back down knowing it was only her.
"you okay [y/n]?"
she put down a couple of nail polish bottles on the table nearby and sat down on the floor next to your bed.
"hmm...? yeah I'm fine"
she lightly hits your head and you let out a soft "ow"
"What's wrong?"
she opens a light pink shade of nail polish and starts to paint her nails.
"well... it's fugo again..."
you started.
"go on"
"I think that I'm in love but I don't know if my hearts leading me astray... I just want to be close to him but he is so far away it feels like we have no time...
I feel so turned around on what to do I hate to complicate things, I just need to understand what it means to be in love"
she hums as a sign she is still listening to you.
"and do you wonder how things happen so fast
I try my best not to get stuck into the past
and do you wonder how things never feel rightdo you wish sometimes that you could be somebody else? cause I do
I'm worried about a future that I haven't got all planned out
I'm scared of facing these feelings that I've never felt. I keep thinking that one day I'll love him and he'll love meI get to thinking about his sunkissed face
And a quiet place where I could give him all my time, he's just so lovely and I can't help but fall for him."
you ran your fingers through your hair as you let out a sigh."I'm not tryna complicate none of this, I'm just looking for some balance and some trust, just some mutual love.
I want to get lost in an offbeat rhythm with him feeling the way he moves. I don't even know why but I'm so lost in him, and all that he does.
and here I go I never really know why I think about him, but he gives me so much hope so I keep him close he gives me the most but I never knew why"
you smile and cover your face with your arms, hiding the tears that were forcing their way through. you sniffle.
"and did I ever get to tell you what you meant to me? and did you know that you were always like a fantasy, are you off to see the places that were in your dreams?
and will I ever get the chance to be your fantasy? and will I see you down the road wherever that may be? well if I do I'll tell you that you were my fantasy..."covering up your eyes tears start to fall down your face, sniffling and choking on your own sobs. Trish stopped what she was doing to comfort you, you cared and loved him but you thought so lowly of yourself you convinced yourself you never had a chance in the first place.
"I'm just setting myself up to crash and burn..."
Trish hugged you but you pushed her away. you didn't mean to vent to her, you felt terrible for spilling out your feelings to her. you didn't want to hurt her anymore.unknown to you, fugo had been standing outside your door the whole time. Bucciarati had sent him to get you for something he needed, but he stopped by at the wrong time. he heard everything though it was muffled.
he didn't think twice before busting your door open and practically running to you to give you a hug, he held on tight to you basically toppling over you. this just made you cry more realizing he had heard everything. Trish moved away for a bit.
"F...F-fugo..."
you wanted to try and explain yourself to him but nothing else would come out. you felt weak and helpless, the only thing you could do was squeeze fugo and sob on him. you pulled on the back of his shirt and sobbed uncontrollably into his chest.
"you idiot..."
hearing these words from him stung like a bitch but you knew he was right, you were stupid, a dumbass, you let yourself go too much. you sobbed into his chest even more after hearing those words but then.
you felt a kiss on your forehead."I love you..."
☞︎︎︎♪✫✯~~~~~~~~~~~✯✫♪☜︎︎︎
posted: December 8th, 2020
words: 1066
UNEDITED
I just wanted to make a short one shot for my baby boy fugo :))

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