the day the beetles came

the big day

i'm sitting upstairs at my bathroom table, looking into my oblong mirror. what i see is a average girl with blond hare. she is wearing pony clips in her hair and the horse sticker on her lip from 2017 is hanging on tight as ever. i look into her ocean blue eyes. she is wearing her favorite band's top: the beetles. they all look so cool i wish i was them. she is also wearing long denim shorts that her evil stepmother forces her to wear. i lean into the mirror and neigh. today is the first day of seventh grade and i need to protect my identity of quirky girl. i pick up my pink and purple seqeunced bag and put in my books. school is so stupid no one even listens to the beetles. i neigh one more time and stroke my poster of jon lemon. i cried when i found out he died even though i was 35 years too late to save him. i hear my stepmom s scratchy voice "kumi come down now!" god i hate her, some days i wish i could run her over with my horse. as i descend the rickety steps, i here voices in the longe. i put in my hannah montana earbuds and play elinor rugby at full blast. i wish i was depressed, it's so cool. anyway when i get to the bottom of the stairs, my stpemom motions for me to remove my earbuds. "darling, i've got some news. because we hate you so fucking much and you're only a liability to our finances, we sold you. do you want to meet your new owners?" I smile because i now i'm finally escaping my evil stepmom. i stick the middle finger at her and walk into the longe. as i turn the corner i see them. ITS THE BEETLES. paul comes to me and says "allo guvner, ow are you koomi?" i know i'm blushing like crazy cause it's the actual beetles. i can't contain my joy, i jump into paul's arms for a hug. then i hug gorge but i don't hug ringo cause he's boring. "weve got ar yellow submarine parked outside, let's go". i slap my mom one more time, neigh and then walk out the door. we drive for 17 months, talking about their music all the way. there was no space for me so i sat on ringo. "careful koomi, your fat arse is suffocating him!!" i blush and continue to sit, knowing i will take his place in the band now that he's dead. we finally arrive at our location: abbi road. i'm pulsing with nerves. they all walk out and take their places and i get reddy. i walk out on the hot road, ready to take the picture for the iconic album. i stand, waiting for the photographer when a car comes. it hits me at 170736km/h. i hit the bonnet and go flying. i feel a million bones crack. as i hit the ground, i know i'm gonna dye. i look up and see them standing over my mangled corpse. i watch as paul reaches down and strangles me. i'm too dying to be horny. he squeezes the life out of me and says "goodnight koomi"