I promise
I can hate me
more than you ever could
and I promise
I never left
and I promise
I thought what I was giving you was help
I cried uncontrollably
while people who weren't who I needed
weren't you
told me to let go
told me you lied
told me you manipulated me
and when you degraded me
told me I didn't deserve the truth
told me I was crazy
told me I was a burden
told me I tortured you
told me to leave you alone forever
I was still yelling at the people who told me to let you go
I screamed, cried, punched, and kicked
I fought for your respect
I pleaded with them to tell me it was a lie,
a dream
and I needed you
and I promise
you could never hate me more
than I hate myself
if only
I'd known
how to save a life
