Okay, Who thinks it was a good idea. Because I don't find any entertainment in this situation. Before I can reply, he lifts me in bridal style with a smirk on his face. I glare at him.
"Look blake you can't do this to me," I said to him in complete...
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• J A N E TD A N I E A L S •
Do you ever had felt that you want to die and yet you can't? Like you want to end your life like two minutes ago then the idea completely vanishes from your mind. That's the thing going on my mind right now. I am feeling so depressed and sad. I don't know how to deal with these emotions. I have no idea. It was feeling very great to die but now standing near the cliff and looking down through the cliff doesn't look like a good idea anymore.
It's nighttime, not late yet and here I am standing near the cliff deciding if I should end my life or not. The cool wind passes through the forest causing me to shiver and hug myself to keep my body warm. What will be the consequences if I jump from here? I will die and there will be nothing to take care of. Yeah, that will be fine. But what will be other reactions? Will they care? My family or friends that what we call them. Honestly, I never felt that I have a family or friends. I just feel left out from every place and environment. And I hate that feeling of loneliness and feeling burden. When no one tries to help you. Hell, they don't even understand me. There is no point.
Nothing at all.
Now I cant even jump. I am too scared to die. I want to disappear but I just can't. I don't know how to kill myself and feel no guilt at all. You have three more months. Let's finish high school. I can die after graduation or in the new year. I don't care.
"Three more months, " I whisper last time.
With that, I turn on my heels and left the forest. I run towards the bus stop and get to my original place. I am not going home now. I know there will be lots of drama and shit. That I don't want to see at least not after attempting suicide.
So that's what I did. I went to a nearby cafe and take my place at the last corner. I don't want to get noticed and second I don't want to be bothered at my sad time. I will be angry for no reason.
I rest my head on the chair and take a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm myself down. It helps but no one can calm my mind down, at least my overthinking.
What will my parents do when I will die?
Certainly, they won't be proud of me and will make a beautiful tombstone for me. 'HERE LIES STUPID GIRL JANET DANIELS' I can see the perfect tombstone for me from my so-called lovely family. Yet I can't change that fact. What will my friends think of me? That bitch finally died. Maybe. I should have known that there is something wrong-
"Hey."
Someones cold voice made me come out from my fairy tale. It was a fairy tale but not with rainbows and unicorns.
I look up and find a boy who is wearing a hood on his head. I can see his face but not completely. Even with his hood, he looks handsome. I raise my eyebrows.
"Yeah?" I ask not being rude.
"You are sitting at my booth go somewhere else." He said again with his cold voice.
I look at the table and back at him.
"There is no name written over here," I said bitterly.
"It's not but you can't sit here. Go somewhere else." He said again firmly. I roll my eyes.
"I am not going anywhere else," I said looking at his eyes.
He didn't respond and sit in front of me. I think he gives up so I close my eyes and focus back on my breathing. But he hadn't given up yet cause I feel his burning, gaze right through me. Okay, he is glaring at me with full anger. Oh, come on you can't just say to get up from the place when it's public and not yours. Who does he think he is?
I waited for a few minutes and he had given up on me. I open my eyes and found him staring down at the table like it the loveliest thing in the world. Oh man look at me I am the pretty one here.
Okay, my mind is rambling.
"Hey, boy. What is your name?" I ask him since I am bored and I don't like his presence at all.
He didn't responds nor lookup. He is a loner? I ask myself. No, it can't be possible I mean look at him. He looks like a greek god. Who won't like to talk to him?
Of course you.
I roll my eyes at this voice.
"I asked you something." I try it again.
He didn't respond at all.
"Hey, hoodie boy," I said again.
He won't answer but I will not give up.
"Come on. I won't harm you." I say to him.
No response.
"I don't bite if you want to know." This time I said smugly.
No response.
"What-"
"Just shut up." He said without looking up.
At least he replied.
"I was just-" He cut me off again.
"I don't want to talk so just shut the fuck up." He said with a cold voice.
"But what's wrong-" He cut me off again.
"I don't care."He replies.
Damm this boy. I start asking him more questions but he just ignored me the rest of the time. When I finally understood he doesn't want to talk I give up. After an hour I left towards my home.
Okay, I can't even call it by so-called 'home' word.
When I finally reached there I open the door and tipped off towards my room. Reaching there I locked the door and changed myself into some comfortable clothes. I jump on my bed skipping on my bed and close my eyes.
I don't have bad thoughts today as I have every day.
But I wonder who was that boy and why he was there?
I can find tomorrow if I met him again.
That brings a big grin to my face.
But tomorrow there is school.
Shit, it means I have to meet my friends. Dammit, I hate everyone and everything. I don't even believe that I have friends.
