Taking Rein

Chapter 29: Like you

Chapter 29: Like you

Sophie's POV

*****

I was breathless as we pulled away, both because of the kiss, and because of the shock. An immense sense of guilt started eating me up at the thought of Charlotte having fun with her friend, whilst I was there kissing her crush. Did it make any difference that he kissed me? I wanted him to kiss me, and I kissed back. I was as much to blame for it as he was, and I couldn't help but feel as if I was betraying her. 

"You have no idea of how long I had wanted to do that," Liam said with a soft sigh as he rested our foreheads together. 

I pursed my lips and closed my eyes. I had no idea how I was supposed to react to any of that. The thought of Charlotte and how betrayed she would feel were she to find out flooded my mind. How was I supposed to express my feelings for Liam and not feel as if I was letting my cousin down? 

"Liam," I sighed, scrambling my mind to try and find the right thing to say. 

I didn't want to hurt Charlotte, but I surely didn't want to hurt Liam either. He was important to me, and I knew that if I were to push him away in that moment, I would be losing him. I didn't want to hurt him after he had just opened up to me about his past experience with a girl. It took us a lot to get into the spot we were in, and he had helped me more than anybody else had ever managed to. 

He was standing there, waiting for me to say something, whilst I was driving myself crazy. I had to say something, and I was sincerely hoping that it wasn't going to be the wrong thing. 

"We can't do this, Liam," I said as I looked at him, our eyes locking. 

I could see a hint of pain flash in his eyes. His body got rigid as he kept looking at me, clearly shocked at what I had just told him. 

"Why not, Soph?" He asked. "I like you, it's not a mystery anymore, but I also know that you like me. You wouldn't have kissed me like that if you didn't."

Hearing the way in which he said those words made my heart ache. He sounded confused and hurt, and I had no idea how to react to any of that. I had to make a choice, and that choice was not an easy one. How was I supposed to choose between my cousin, the one person who had always been a friend to me, and Liam, the one person who showed me what real happiness was like. 

"I never said that I didn't like you," I said as a small smile formed on his face. "But I can't."

He froze at my words, and took a step away from me. I could see the hurt look in his features, and I wished that I could just run up to him and hug him. I didn't want to have to choose between Charlotte and Liam, so I tried to keep them both. Yet, I knew that no matter what I chose, one of them was going to get hurt, and I was going to get hurt along with them. 

"Why? Is it because I'm not fancy and rich enough for you?" He said, taking me by surprise.

I knew that he was hurt, but I couldn't help but feel bad at the fact that his pain made him say such cruel things, both about me and himself. Liam was so much more amazing than any other guy I had ever met, and I wished that he could know that. 

"I never said that. Stop twisting my words," I pleaded, feeling tears starting to form in my eyes out of frustration. 

 For a moment, I got mad at him for being so dramatic and making a big deal out of the entire situation, but then I truly thought about it. I rejected him. I lead him on, I had just admitted that I liked him, but then went on to telling him that we couldn't be together. Of course he would think that the reason why I didn't want to be with him had something to do with our differences.