So Much In Common: Book 1

Chapter 17: Uncle Jokes

"Nifty's pregers!?!?" Angel exclaimed as the cat demon before him stood with the little demon with her hand in his.

"Yes." Nifty stated plainly, as if she hadn't just dropped a huge bombshell.

"Does this mean my jokes are Uncle Jokes now?" Alastor spoke with a hint of glee. He liked the idea of being an uncle.

"I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you ruin my kid with your stupid old man jokes!" Husk spoke with a hint of malice. He already couldn't stand Alastor telling Dad Jokes, he would just die a second time if his child began spouting out Dad Jokes like the deer that he calls a friend.

"But you already are damned!" Alastor's microphone suddenly played an audience's laughter, making the big cat growl in annoyance.

"Is that why you've been so attentive to Nifty, Husk? Because she's pregnant?" Charlie asked in a soft, calm voice. She received a nod as her answer from the bartender.

"Have you guys decided a name?" Vaggie asked. Surprisingly, Vaggie actually like kids, and was thrilled at the thought of having one around the hotel. It also gave her a reason to treat hotel guests poorly. Not even Charlie would be nice to a hotel guest that attempted to hurt an innocent little baby.

"Well," Nifty looked up at Husker, who merely nodded that she could continue, "we wanted to give it a flexible name, so we decided to name the baby, Finley." Nifty beamed as she said the name, and even rubbed her stomach for emphasis. It was clear that she liked the name very much, and seeing her so happy caused Husk to smile a little. He loved Nifty dearly, and would shoot anyone who would dare lay a finger on her.

"Finely...I like it." Angel Dust said. He then walked over and pointed at Nifty's stomach, which no bulged slightly, "Can I feel for kickin'?"

"Sure, Angel." Like a child on Christmas, the spider joyfully placed a hand on the significantly smaller demons stomach. Unlike Vaggie, Angel didn't like kids, he loved them. He never admitted this to anyone, not even Cherri, but Angel had always wanted a kid of his own. The spider always admired a mother, especially his own, who could both be the fun and caring parent, yet still keep her kids in line when needed. How he longed to be able to provide something like that to children of his own.

Alas, Angel was gay, and always had been gay. That meant he couldn't have kids the old fashion way. He had tried adoption, but no adoption agency from the 1900's was going to let a gay hooker adopt kids. So for Angel Dust, having kids was nothing more then an unobtainable dream.

"Wow, li'l tike's got some power." The ex-porn star said as he felt the powerful baby kicks. He almost couldn't believe Nifty was standing up.

"Yeah, the baby has it's daddy's strength." Nifty gave Husk a wink, making him gaze down at the floor to keep the others from seeing him blush. He swore if Alastor ever caught him blushing, he might actually have a stroke. The deer meant well, but sometimes his corny jokes could embarrass the crap out of you.

"So how are you guys planning on taking care of it, Husker?" Alastor asked seemingly out of nowhere.

"We figured we could take shifts." Husk responded mildly, "You know, I take care of it for a certain period during work, then Nifty takes care of it during work, then we can both do it when we're free."

"You're plannin' on takin' care of it while ya tend bars, and while ya clean the hotel!?" Everyone stared at Angel after he gave his sudden outburst.

"Yes." Nifty spoke softly, not sure how to respond.

"Oh, no! You won't get anythin' done that way!" There was nothing, but silence as the spider went into a rant.

"The baby is gonna need near constant attention, so you can't keep an eye on it, and work at the same time. Ya also gotta make sure you feed it enough, that it has a clean diaper, and that it's able to sleep enough. You're gonna want to get it a crib to keep in ya'lls room, and some stuff for it to play with out here, you're also gonna want to make sure that it has somethin' soft to sleep on if it just s'ddenly falls asleep while playin'. Speakin' of playin', it needs toys that it can't choke on, like a stuffed animal, and it's always good to have teethin' rings early on. You can get the baby used to playin' with them, and-" Angel stopped mid-sentence when he realized everyone was staring at him. The smile he had worn while talking about babies vanished, and was replaced by a look of fear.

"How do you know so much about infants, my darling?" Alastor asked, shocked from what he'd just heard fall out of his lover's mouth. He hadn't taken Angel Dust for one to be so knowledgeable about the human young.

"Oh, well..." What was Angel supposed to say? That he'd spent whatever free time he didn't spend fucking some random dude, or shooting up with drugs, he spent reading every baby book he could get his hands on? Yeah that's totally something they would expect him to say. The fruity gay man who's dating a cannibal wants kids of his own, even after decades of knowing he'd never be able to have at least one, he still wanted kids. He couldn't say that, especially not to Alastor.

Alastor, who had been nothing but sweet and loving since they'd started their relationship. Alastor, who had done everything to make him happy, even freeing him from Valentino's contract. Alastor, the love of his life. Alastor, who Angle couldn't bear to see hurt. How could he tell him that the one thing he wanted most in the world was something the deer simply couldn't provide?

"I..." The spider met the eyes of the Radio Demon, and saw nothing but love, "Oh, I think Cherri's calling!" Angel Dust quickly pulled out his phone and pretended to be on a call with his bestie. He walked out of the hall, not looking back as he mad his way to the elevator. Cherri wouldn't mind a surprise visit, would she?

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Merry Christmas bitches!!! Since so many of you liked this story, I've decided to continue it for a bit. Consider it my Christmas gift to you! Happy holidays everyone!