A Trio of Thieves

The Boys Have a Hangover

There comes a time in every sibling's life when they think 'Imma fuck this bitch up' and put on their (imaginary or realistic) boxing gloves. This is an epiphany that Tenko had reached many times and is currently experiencing again.

Why?

"YOU FUCKING IDIOT!" Tenko screeched as they lept wildly into the alley. "A PRO HERO OF THIS LEVEL IS NOT A TOY!!"

Rewind for a bit and watch it all happen from the beginning.

---

"Mornin'" Touya yawned as he ruffled Izuku's hair. 

"Morning," Izuku responded.

Tenko looked at both of them from the living room floor. "Isn't it too bright to be the morning...?"

All three of them glanced at the clock and froze.

"Who's idea was it to break out the booze?" Tenko whispered, glancing at the empty bottles littering the floor.

Izuku scrunched his eyebrows. "I think it was...Touya's?" He hummed before nodding his head lightly. "Yeah, definitely Touya's. He wanted to celebrate the fact that we took out Kamui." 

Touya groaned from where he was standing and closed the drapes. "Good fucking job, me. A hangover is a splendid reward."

Tenko sighed and had Izuku help him off of the floor. "I forget that he's sarcastic with himself too." 

Izuku shrugged his shoulders and sat Tenko on the couch. "We are too, I mean, who's better company than yourself?"

Tenko rubbed his head. "A therapist would say literally anyone else."

"And?" Touya asked from the kitchen.

"Good point, 'night," Tenko muttered before falling backward on the couch. 

Izuku grabbed his head and slapped him awake. "Oh no you don't, no sleeping, we got a job at four, remember?"

Tenko sighed and sat up, grimacing at the sudden movement. "I remember, I remember! It's for..what's his name.....some All for One-or was it One for All?-dude." Tenko raised his hands and shook them. "Gotta steal from U.A. Yaaaaaay!" 

"Don't get sassy because your hangover is kicking your ass," Touya scolded. "Now get up, we ALL have to put on semi-presentable clothes."

Izuku groaned at the call-out. "My clothes are semi-presentable. 'S not my fault you don't have the confidence to wear short-shorts."

Touya picked up a pair of jeans. "Do you?"

Izuku looked down at his sweatpants and thought for a moment. "Nope!" He stood up, wobbled, and managed to successfully grab the jeans from Touya without throwing up. 

Tenko glared at them from the couch. "I swear," he said as he downed two glasses of water, "that you two don't have any energy, yet somehow never stop moving."

"What happens in motion stays in motion, I guess," Touya said as he sniffed a shirt that was crumpled into a basket. "Dad wanted me to keep moving as a kid so I never took a moments' rest. Now I can't stop moving."

"Same here," Izuku said from the bathroom. "Gotta keep moving if you don't want the bullies to find you."

Tenko stared at the even harder before standing up and throwing on his black hoodie. "Damn you guys are your relatable points. Dad kept drinking and the bottles kept flying. Had to dodge them and now I can't sit still either." He paused. "Well, that's a lie. We all probably know how to petrify."

"Amen," Izuku said as he slid into the kitchen. Literally. 

Touya snorted as his little brother landed on his ass. " 'Get a house with tile', you said. 'It'll be easier', you said."

Izuku sat up. "I didn't say shit, that was Tenko." 

The blue-haired man walked effortlessly on the smooth tile. "I also grew up running on tile, amateur." 

Touya stepped slowly on the tile. "C'mon, Izu, we have places to be. Remember, high-paying job!"

Izuku rose onto his feet gracefully as Touya finished speaking. "Why didn't you day the job way high-paying?"

Tenko nodded his head as he grabbed his keys. "We could've been out of this house hours ago. Money is time. Time is money. We waste none of it."

"I waste money," Touya said, raising his hand.

Tenko squinted at him. "On what?"

"You bitches."

Izuku scoffed and pointed toward the door. "Get your ass outside before me and Tenten agree to take away any percentage of the prize you might get."

Touya held up his hands in surrender and walked out the door. "See y'all in the car."

"Backseat," Tenko called out.

"Nice try," Touya snorted. "You don't have a driver's license."

"I have a fake one and I don't have scars decorating my face."

"No, but you look like you could drop dead any second."

"Mummy."

"Desert."

"Momma's boy."

"Cry baby."

"Redhead."

"Before picture they use on skin ointment ads."

"GET IN THE FUCKING CAR!"

--

Izuku smiled as he turned the radio to his favourite channel. 

"Mori Mori Mori-"

Tenko stood up from the backseat and turned the channel. "No."

Izuku huffed and changed it back. "Yes."

Tenko held his hand on the button. "No."

Izuku smiled and tried to break his finger. "Yes."

"Hey, guys?"

Tenko ignored Touya as he turned the radio to a different channel. "No."

Izuku also ignored Touya as he fought to turn the radio back to its original channel. "Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"Um, guys?"

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Guys?!"

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"GUYS!"

Tenko and Izuku parked the car and turned around. "WHAT?!"

Touya pointed calmly to the giant UA that sat blocks behind them. "You drove past our stop."