Drabbles - Oneshots and Imagines

Chapter 2 - QI (Alan Davies)

(A/n) Using the same idea from the last chapter that the reader is Alan's wife and is also the opposing team captain on QI. This is based on Series 15 episode 1

On tonight's episode of QI, you, Phil Jupitus and Claudia Winkelman were on one team and your husband Alan and his good friend Bill Bailey were on the other. After the introduction and the preview of everyone's buzzer (yours was Oh What A Feelin') it was time for the show to begin.

The show began with the five of you playing an arcade game which involved a grabber and some balls (after you'd managed to grab one you promptly threw it at your unsuspecting husband's head...let's just say you managed to hit your target, which everyone apart from Alan himself found very entertaining). Somehow Alan managed to get the correct answer which involved a ship with a massive grabber hidden inside. As Sandi began to explain the details of the operation, Alan suddenly let out an evil laugh which made you snort with laughter. He glanced over at you and sends you a cheeky wink and an evil smirk once he saw that you were laughing. You responded by tapping the tips of your fingers together in an evil fashion whilst having a mischievous glint in your eyes which Alan found very entertaining.
Bill began explaining his own version of the game which he coined "whack a nuke" which was very entertaining and he and Alan began to mime out the game doing whacking motions in the air.
After revealing that all claw machines were rigged and the determination of an Irish three year old that climbed into the machine in order to win a toy from it.

Sandi then moved on to explain about disposable submarines which are used by the Mexican Drug Trade to transport their drugs across the sea. Bill then revealed that he already knew this information which began the questioning of how exactly he knew this. Phil believed that he owned his own disposable submarine and after Bill explained that he had an "interest" in the Mexican Drug Trade. You then asked, "What sort of interest is this exactly Bill, and should we be concerned?". This earned a laugh from the audience and after deciding that Bill was in a fact a Mexican Druglord in disguise (this was mostly decided by you, Phil and Alan) the show moved on.

After discussing different ologies and earning a few points, Sandi then asked the panel a question, "What has a U two T's and three I's?".

"What I'd like just before we continue, is some sort of deal that you're not gonna make the klaxon noise." said Claudia as she expressed her dislike towards the all too familiar klaxon sound.

"You don't like the klaxon noise?" You asked her.

"Well, I think I'll just jump and it will be nerve-racking." she explained to you.

"Don't worry, I was similar to you when it was first introduced but you get used to it once he's set it off enough times." You said whilst gesturing to your husband who had a look of mock offence on his face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Alan asked, in a high pitched tone clearly conveying his offence.

"All that I'm saying darling, is that you and your blue whale have set that klaxon off enough times that I'm pretty sure I now hear it in my sleep." I explained to him. The audience immediately began clapping and cheering whilst Alan stood there still looking mockingly offended.

"But everyone likes my blue whale answers." He replied meekly sounding like a put down schoolboy.

"Of course they do dear." You consoled him, sounding like a mother consoling their child. Your conversation made the audience laugh more at your childish antics with your husband.
Sandi attempts to compromise with Claudia regarding the klaxon, but is interrupted by the klaxon itself sounding with the word 'OK' which sparked a laugh out of everyone.

After confusing Phil with lizards and their three eyes, Henry a 111 year old first time father, how a smartphone can interrupt your sleep schedule and a glimpse into Bill's future as he talks to his chameleon about the danger of smartphones, the show continued.
Sandi asked both teams to cover a red circle using some smaller silver circles.