Miracle, Baby

Chapter 6

"Max?" Tul pushed away as he didn't answer. Now he was getting pissed. Again.

Max could feel his face flushing. "Damn, Tul... I want to sleep." Tul hadn't said he loved him back, now did he? He wasn't going to be the first one admitting that he really did love him when Tul wouldn't stop running from his teasing. It was just teasing... until Tul really answered him.

"Fuck you, Max!" Tul punched him, just hard enough that he was upset. Tul swung his feet over the bed and fought back the tears. He was done crying over this asshole. It was so like Max to take him to space and then dump him. "Honestly, I don't know what you want from me."

Max sat up on the bed and crossed his legs. He stared curiously at the back of Tul's head, waiting for him to bolt. "Can you honestly tell me if I say it again, you won't run?" Max's hands itched to touch him, to pull him into his arms. He saw his shoulders slump and wondered why...

"Tul?"

"Max..." Mimicry was Tul's safety zone. He resorted to it when he felt cornered. Max was beginning to feel very confused. He was the one who said the dreaded eight letters, so what was Tully's problem? 

"Fine, fine... I got it." Max stood up. "So no cuddling. No sharing. I'm gonna go shower and I'll sleep in my own bed." His eyes alight on the bottle of whisky and he snatched it. "Call for an ambulance if you hear a crash." 

Tul felt the tears roll as he heard the sarcasm roll off his tongue. Why did things always fall apart when it came time to talk about himself to Max? He slid slowly off the bed and hid his face in his knees and let the tears roll. These weren't tears for Max, they were for himself. 

How hard was it to say, "I love you, Max, I always have. I have since our second kiss."  Maybe... because he couldn't trust how easily Max told him how lovable he was? 

Tul didn't think he was. He was many things and he was very proud of everything he had accomplished. From his schooling to his current occupation, including his businesses, he had accomplished many things for his age. The one thing he was not was loveable. 

Granted, he was beloved, he was adored by his fan base. He worked hard to fit an image but the few who truly knew who he was, they didn't love him. They liked and admired him. He wanted someone to know him for him. What was the western saying? Warts and all... 

The carpet started to irritate his sore bottom. He really wanted a shower but he could hear the water still running. No way was he going to shower with Max now. He wasn't the one who consistently runs. HE would prove it. He pulled out his bathrobe and curled in the room's only armchair.

Pulling out his phone, he went on social media to see what the latest news was. WTF! He hurled the phone across the room and crawled under covers. Come hell or high water, HE was NOT showing up on the set. That fucking manager...

Max hadn't touched a drop of whiskey. Instead, the cold shower had blasted any remnants of the booze from his system and allowed him to think clearly. Why was Tul so upset about him saying those words? He didn't want to leave the safety of the shower until he worked through the problem but the sound of the something crashing, scared him.

Was Tul okay? It was bad enough he'd have to pay for one room repair. Max rushed out of the bathroom with water dripping everywhere to see nothing but a lump under the covers. It was shaking. 

"Tul? Tul?" Max went to the bed and tried to pull the covers off him. "Tul, come on, talk to me. What's wrong?" Holy fuck, it was as if the last half day had never happened. He couldn't take Tul being a turtle no longer. 

"I've had it, Tul. So what if I do love you? Is it that hard to be loved by me?" Max sank next to him, now wishing he still had the bottle. Whiskey would have made this much easier. 

"What the fuck, Max?" Tul's head popped out of the bundle of blankets. "Why do you assume this is about you?" 

"Shouldn't I? You won't say anything. You don't tell me anything after that. I can only assume you don't want to be with a gay man after all." Max's face looked blank, like it was carved out of stone. Only his eyes showed any emotion. They were solid black, but glistened, glowed with some inner light. 

"You're a fucking idiot, Max Nattapol. If you're gay then so am I. WE HAD FUCKING SEX. WE, not you. You think I'd let just anyone fuck me? You think I'd buy sex toys and practice for just any fucking man? I wanted it to be better than the last time but I didn't think I'd wait 18 fucking months. You're just an asshole. You use the love word to screw me over." Tul buried his head again and from a buried pile, "What's love anyways? I don't know and I don't care."

Max felt like he'd been hit over the head. "I think it means you love me. What do you mean you practiced?" Come to think about it, Tul wasn't in any pain like the last time... and he really knew how to suck. Max felt a flare of jealousy deep in his soul. "Who'd you let fuck you, Tul?" He was angry now.

With all his strength he flipped Tul out of his cocoon. "Who'd you fuck in the past 18 months, Tul?" Their eyes met and Tul gave a crooked grin. His robe gaped, flashing his tanned, bare chest.

"You want to see, Max? Fine, I'll show you." He jumped up from the tangled nest and grabbed the small bag hidden in a corned of his suitcase. Throwing at Max, he tried to run for the bathroom. Max was swifter now. Catching the bag, he also managed to catch the back of Tul's robe and pull. 

It caught Tul off guard and he twisted back into Max's arms. "Let me go." He struggled and Max shook his head.

"Not until I open this little gift." Max pushed Tul back to the bed and straddled his hips to hold him in place as he unzipped the bag and tipped it out. His mouth fell open as he took in the "toys". Dildos, butt plugs and lube were carefully packed in the bag. Several sizes of each so Max knew they were for adjusting to size. One was even bigger than a human could ever possibly be... 

"Why?" Max whispered softly. "Why would you do this?"

Tul couldn't meet his eyes. Just as softly, "Our next time had to be perfect." He kept his face hidden from Max.

Max slid off of him and gently gathered him into his arms. He wasn't clear on what the hell was going on inside Tul's head but HE rather enjoyed that night in the Philippines. It was the first time he'd ever had sex with someone he loved, rather than lusted for... that alone made it memorable.