When Kevin Loves

Never meant for me

I think I had misheard her, what did she mean by the gift wasn't meant for me.

What do you mean? I asked, you could see that I was scared of what her answer might be.

That gift was not meant for you, I meant to give it to Jeremy but you were not receiving gifts so I decided to give it to you. I forgot to wipe off the message in it, sorry if you thought I liked you.

I felt devastated, I felt wronged, I felt hate. All my pain, my suffering just because of a fucking mistake.

She was scared but I didn't care, she has not known yet the true meaning of fear.

Tell me you are joking Tricia I said, tell me that you are lying.

I'm not, I swear I'm not she replied, it was just a mistake.

Goddammit. I felt sadness consume me, I felt like I was drowning in despair.

A mistake, do you know for how long I've loved you for that, I felt like you were the only there for me.

I'm sorry, I'm truly am sorry.

I held her shoulders, are you sure that you don't have a single feeling for me, None at all .

Hey leave her alone, you weirdo" was what I heard behind me as I was pushed away from Tricia.

I fell to the ground, looking up I could see a group of Tricia's friends along with her boyfriend.

They were asking her if she was OK and if I was hurting her.

She replied in the negative and they left, but not without a parting message for me to stay away from Tricia.

I curled up, and cried, I have not cried in almost 6 years but today I cried like a baby.
And as if they heavens were also sad with me, it started to rain.