"You've reached Westerden Ski Lodge, how may I be of assistance?" "Hey, can I rent some snow boots and skis? Maybe even a girlfriend, if you've got any in stock." "Awesome, do you want to order a life along with that? The gift wrapping's free of charge." "I'll take what I can get." ...
Book 3 (Can be read as a standalone) ❝ Never had the world seen two people as different.❞ But they fell in love anyway. #5 in Short Story Beautiful cover by xFakingaSmilex
Book 1 ❝ She was sweet like cookies, he was smooth like cream.❞ In which two best friends break apart but slowly find their way back home. #8 in short story Cover by xFakingaSmilex
❝hi this is Panda Express, how may I help you?❞ ❝can i have one order of general tso's chicken? hold the chicken, double the vegetables.❞ ❝how in the world is that general tso's chicken?❞ ☂ lowercase intended. story inspired by many others. ☂ -- just a pinch of love #1 -- #339 in humor 1/2/15
anonymous: why you gotta be so rude? alex-burke: no (c) c-araphernelia 2014 !! lowercase intended !! **pls no hate bc i wrote this a long time ago and i hate myself **
"Hello?" "Is your house on fire?" "No...?" "Man, I thought it was because you're so dang hot." "I think you need to work on that." ... One prank call One girl One guy One great story ********* Cover by RaghaddMurad Highest Rating: #1 in short story
[You can now purchase 100 Voicemails' paperback on Amazon!] After a car accident, seventeen year old Steve Carlton, goes into a coma. When he does wake up after a few months, he suffers from temporary memory loss. During this time, he starts to go through his messages and voicemails on his cellphone, trying to get a...
❝Hello, this is the Starb-❞ ❝HEEELP ME!! PLEASE! THERE'S A MURDERER IN MY HOUSE!❞ ❝OH SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!! WHAT DO I DO?! THIS IS STARBUCKS, NOT FREAKING 911. WAIT, HOLD ON. TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE, I'LL CALL 911!! STAY CALM. IT'S GOING TO BE O- ❞ ❝Wait...did you just say Starbucks?❞ ❝Um...yeah?❞ ❝They have a hotlin...
"Give me ten days, and I can give you ten reasons not to die." Evan paused. "And if I can't change your mind by then, you can go jump off that cliff."
❝ello love❞ ❝how did you know british accents are my favorite?❞ ❝love, i know everything❞ ❝you even know how to charm the pants off a girl❞ ❝are you saying your pants are off?❞ in which a boy steals a girl's heart through text messages. ________________________________ sequel to stolen number highest ranking: #sevent...
❝hey, sweet cheeks❞ ❝do i know you?❞ ❝damn, i'm offended after all we have been through❞ ❝wrong number?❞ ❝try stolen number, babe❞ in which a boy steals a girl's number from his friends phone. ________________________________ highest ranking: #eleven in short story lowercase intended
She was the girl behind the typewriter, the one everyone called cupid, but no one really knew her ✉ He was the boy behind the glasses, the one everyone called nerd, but no one really knew him ✉ highest ranking: #twenty two in short story
Who knew what could be made out of annoying calls, anonymous texts, and a little bit of chemistry? -highest rank #8 in short story -contains some mature content -completed but unedtited
"I may work here, but that doesn't mean I drink coffee." "Why?" "Well, why dont you like cats?" "I'm allergic to cats." "Then, let's just say I'm allergic to coffee." #5 in Short Story [7/15/16] Book Three From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights Reserved
"Quick Clean Laundry! When it's dirty we make it clean, this is Melissa speaking." "uh...." "Hello?.." "I asked a cute girl her number and this is what she gave me" #3 in Short Story [8/1/16] Book One From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights Reserved
"Aurel?" "I told you I'm not a girl" "Well, since I haven't seen you, your sexuality is not confirmed" "You want me to send you a pic of my penis?" "tempting but no" #1 in short story [7/22/16] Book Two From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights Reserved This book was edited by @LunaValdez24
"Don't tell me it's you again." "It is." "Oh my God." "Babe--" "No, stop." "I want to give you olive my love." #40 in short story - 16. JAN. 2016 #34 - 21/1/2016 #29 - 24/1/2016 #8 - 25/2/2016 #2 in cheese - 7/9/2018 BOOK #1 OF THE FAT FOOD SERIES
"Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." ...
❝i've seen you around here a lot.❞ ❝i know this is the best starbucks around.❞ ❝aren't all starbucks the same?❞ ❝no other starbucks has a girl like you.❞ -- just a pinch of love #3 -- #118 in Humor (3.12.15)
"It's not like you could do anything about Milo." "Who says I can't? I'm Batman. Give the signal and I'll fucking be there." A boy with a unique Batman obsession converses with a smart mouthed girl who has a thing for superheroes. + #10 in Short Story (dialogue category) *old story*
