If perhaps they had met before that crisis, if they had met before Gaipa began to have feelings for Jim, if perhaps they had met long before that, would it have been different? Being tied to a relationship that has already ended created a feeling of guilt and self-hatred. Alan knew that feeling, however, being in love with someone who never showed a sign of interest left him feeling insecure and sad. So many negative feelings together couldn't get anywhere. But if all that feeling disappeared with a single encounter? If I disappeared with a single conversation? A dinner? A casuality?