Why is it so complicated?

Hi Im Jey and for the most parts of my life, ive always seemed so clueless on how to be a human. I have intense opinions that are never expressed due to my social awkwardness, which rendered me a silent background character in everyone's lives... and when i do speak up for myself or try to engage in communication I often instantly regret it because i feel as though what i have just said is either dumb or cringey or i just displayed a side of myself that the next person will judge me for. All this changed until she came along and turned my whole world upside down...