@RedheadWasp hi. Thank for you message. I really appreciate you showing so much enthusiasm fory work. <3
Sorry for the very late reply. I have read your work. Your writing skills are fine I must say. But I would suggest you work on your story arc and plot points.
Writing a story that gives an alternative pov while following canon is very very tricky. If you're going to be deviating from canon, you need to make it clear in the foreword/summary.
Also, for the particular plotline that you have decided to pursue, you will encounter many plot holes like —
-why does Hermione, who doesn't trust the Half blood prince's text book, decide to pick up an unknown notebook and hide it from the authorities? That's very unlike Hermione. What made her do that?
- if the story follows the canon plot, how will you reconcile the Dramione pairing with the canon events? And when?
Etc
There may be many others inconsistencies that may pop up that you may have to retcon. So you will need to think about these in advance if you want your plot to be understandable and smooth.
Sorry if that was too harsh. If you want more pointers feel free to DM me anytime. I'll try my best to respond.
Have a great day. :)