🎺 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN: Detective Plants 😼 has arrived.

You may know me as:

* the ghost reader who votes but never comments because my ass, also known as my beautiful behind, is reading offline,
* the menace who leaves "TOT"s and "LMAO"s in every corner of the comment section,
* or the unhinged theorist, who writes an entire dissertation of theories, dropping essay-length analyses and delulu simp monologues/wild speculation at 2 a.m.

Thank you for your attention. I am at your service.

My inventory: beautiful bae's living in my walls rent-free 🙃