Wattpad has always been my safe place. So I'm here once again to rant out whats in my heart.
So my bade papa, my father's elder brother, just died on my birthday.
And I didn't feel anything when it actually happened because everyone was around. my whole family. So it didn't even felt as if he's not here. But NOW when everyone has left. Now I'm feeling it.
How much value that person hold in our family
He always gifted me flowers on my birthdays. Sometimes bouquet, or sometime single flowers but he always. ON EVERY SINGLE BIRTHDAY gave me one of those. But on my this birthday. I didn't have a flower. Nobody gave me a flower. And that thing kinda hit me today, you know. Like I was just cleaning the house and remembering how the things went in the last 3 days and him. How he was just here a moment ago, and now he's not. And it suddenly clicked like he always gave me flowers and he always gave me those and his wife and me, we shared birthday. Even after her death he never stop but on this birthday nobody was here. HE was not here. I don't know if I'm sounding selfish or whatever
I can't express what I'm feeling right now. I have been crying about this from the evening now it's past midnight I just I don't know. I HATE IT. I hate it how he's not here now. How he's never going to be. I just miss him. I hate this. I hate death. It always takes aways the best person's. He was that sunshine characters, you know? Always making everyone happy always helping everyone. He was the best yaar