Kai/Kaizer

I swear to god some of the best fics I’ve read are Harry Potter fics and because my ships are so unorthodox I can’t even recommend them to people without them specifically telling me they ship it because that information seldomly leaves my lips 

When I finally buy the Harry Potter books so that I can write a accurate fanfiction and find out more about the marauders but turns out all of the stuff I’ve been seeing on tiktok about it is mostly lore and fanon and not actually canon 

You know you’re in deep in fanfictions when the same set of people that once where “omg he’s like his father figure” are now “omg he’s his daddy (sexually, if that’s not obvious)”… needless to say when it comes to fanfiction I no longer have a moral cutoff when it comes to age gaps when both/all party’s are over 18 (18 and 29 okay, 18 and 45 not even batting an eye, 18 and 1000 year old supernatural creature, sure why not) 

I was talking to my mom and I was like “I find it so weird that I have to take 12 pills a day just to survive (3 in the morning, 2 in the afternoon and 7 at night)” like I get it’s to live comfortably and survive but 12 pills… it’s becoming a bit much. 

I’ve been using He/They pronouns since 2021 and now that I’m thinking about it I’ve never once heard a person address me or talk about me and use He/Him.. and it’s even a rare occasion that people use They/Them, it’s always She/Her, always! It’s so frustrating ugh! 

I just saw a video about being tired at school but then realizing that there is only 15 days left before summer and I’m now realizing that I don’t have that summer relief anymore now that I’m working, I have day off relief but it’s really not the same as two/three month straight relief… ugh 

So I’m on tiktok and on videos of shows or movies with like the slime videos underneath, people in the comments are asking what season and episode it is. And it might just be my Autism, but I have a question, do people just watch one episode of a show? Like why do they ask the season and episode instead of just the show? I’m confused :\ 

Here to vent again, so my sister is a sister obviously but she is 7 years older than me so I thought she’d be better. I bought freeze dried candy to share with my family, I bought it with my own money and I was waiting for all the packages to come in before trying them myself and letting other people try them and my sister knew that (even tho she tried to tell me that I must’ve said it in my head because she didn’t hear me) so I opened the first box that came in today and I left it on the counter. 
              Well I was in the car with my mom and my mom called my sister and my sister said she had opened the candy that I bought with my own money that I had decided to share ( I didn’t have to share)… and then she said that I’m overreacting and it’s just candy, I feel like I have a right to be upset that I bought it and I wasn’t even the first to try it let alone the first to open it. And she had the audacity to blame it on her being pregnant, well guess what now she’s not getting any of the other candy that I bought that hasn’t come in the mail yet. 
               And then my mom tried defending her saying that she feels bad about what she did, and that she’s just like my father and she (in other words but basically) gaslights people when she feels bad about what she did, trying to lighten the load on herself by making it seem like what she did was a-okay… I can’t with her, fucking gaslighter 

You know your depression’s bad when you’re nauseous and instead of taking a pill for nausea or eating something ( though most of the time eating makes it worse) you think that you wouldn’t have to experience this nausea,  that’s so bad it’s making you cry, if you were just dead…. I’m sick and tired of wanting to die over minor inconveniences… I just wish I was normal… 

Here to vent again…. I can’t even cry in my room without my mom saying how much it hurts HER to see me in pain and threatening to commit me to inpatient at a mental hospital….. I can’t live in this damn house anymore…. I just can’t