Guys I feel terrible. I’ve been sick and wanting to write but have had inspiration for everything that I am NOT currently writing. It’s super annoying and I also really miss my friend. She moved away a little bit ago and I had a crush on her but she liked someone else. It also didn’t help the fact that I had to pretend to be her girlfriend because she had a crazy ex and I just miss her and want her but I also like this guy at school and we’re going to hoco together and I don’t know. I feel so numb as well and I don’t know how to stop it. I’m really good at hiding my feeling so I’m really good at faking a smile and pushing down all my negative emotions until I actually crash. And I had a band thingy to see who got first chair out of all the flutes playing and I am REALLY good for my age group and considering I played less then them but I got so nervous playing and I went from a couple mistakes to literally everything is messed up and I was going really slow and I was so close to trying in the middle of class and I don’t know anymore. I’m sorry for ranting so much but I just kinda need to vent but I shouldn’t with anyone I actually know because I don’t want them to worry. Again, sorry for the rant. Thank you for listening.
