@InsertCoolUser1
Hey, I know I totally was supposed to be done with wattpad for health reasons but I got grounded and they took my phone and stuff, so I made a new account because I really missed you and I wanted to check in. I swear this is me and I hope you're okay
I HEARD THAT YOURE OKAY. YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW WORRIED I WAS. I LOVE YOU
@LemonDrops4You heh. well i deleted my account cuz i was really unhealthy and i needed to draw back my online usage yknow? but yeah i missed people so i made a new account for a couple days. will delete it in a few, but i wanted to say hi
Babe is everything okay?
hate this feeling
@InsertCoolUser1 heyy bestie... feels good to see you back here :))). I really missed you tbh
my worst fear is that people will see me the way i see myself
quick question: is it normal for my arm to really ache randomly and then i cant use it at all? idk, it really hurts tonight and i can barely move it, let alone use it. and if i do try it sends shocks of pain through my body. idk what to do about this
tw!
today is the ‘anniversary’ as i like to call it of when i tried to kill myself the first time. i was really struggling throughout the day and my friend noticed this, but everyone started talking about depression and how i deal with it (idek how they know about it but whatever)so i got pretty triggered, especially today. so i went to the bathroom and cut my legs and went out to clean them up at the sink (it was the middle of class so nobody was there) and i shit you not my bestfriend was standing there… i had blood dripping down my fucking leg. so i quickly cleaned it up and had a panic attack, and i checked my watch to see how fast my heart rate was going 140bpm. i ran back into class (it was in woodwork so the teacher didnt really care) and tried to calm myself down. i just texted them saying i was sorry and they said that they werent mad at me, just mad at everyone who was triggering me and they came to make sure i wasnt trying to kms, which i was considering. i love them ❤️❤️
its officially the 14th in my country…. today is not gonna be a good day (yes its only like 12:30am but still)
@InsertCoolUser1 You're gonna get through this just fine, ok?. Just keep a steady breathing (deep breaths if u may; much better). Keep repeating positive affirmations to yourself, and be a little narcissistic (if that helps). And keep yourself busy. IK YOU GOT THIS BESTIE. I hope this works :)
everyone say goodbye to my free time!!
@toribarnes1 yup! all the sports are pretty fun tho, im just trying to make sure im doing them becaise im having fun and not bc i wanna get into shape
@toribarnes1 well, i have boxing on tuesdays and thurdays, in-line hockey on wednesday, tennis on friday and athletics training on saturday. on sundays im usually with friends or family, or doing schoolwork, and monday i do school.
so currently it is raining, which is still quite a big trigger for my family and even the dogs get stressed when it rains. but i was outside before the rain started, cuddling the puppies, trying to fend off tears and it started raining, i was trying to not have flashbacks so i sat down on the outside couch, most of the dogs immediately came to my side and started cuddling me, since they were scared too. all the dogs kinda went off in different directions except one, who was sitting in top of me as lay down. the raining got harder and my breathing started to pick up and i started to panic, this sweetheart of a dog noticed immediately and started licking my face (mind you, none of the dogs have ever had any service training) she was also trying to snuggle into my neck more. she calmed me down before the panic attack got too bad and we both had some much needed cuddles. the other dogs also came over again and we were sitting on the couch as i calmed down a bit more. i love my dogs and i would do anything for them, they are the best thing that has ever happened to me.
@NoirTheFirebreather i think i have a couple. im normally alright with soft rain its just when it gets heavy :/
