Greetings,

My name is Jordan and I'm a published author hailing from North of the Wall in the frozen lands of Canada. 

I studied witchcraft and wizardry at Hogwarts, before doing a masters in Sympathy at the University in the Commonwealth, before being expelled of course. 

Since my student days, I have been a dragon rider under King Galbatorix, fought armored polar bears in the arctic and braved the sulfurous fumes of Mordor.

I have hidden my soul away inside of an egg, brought balance to the force, found the holy grail and wielded the triforce of courage. 

You may have heard of me.