l̶i̶e̶

new phone who dis

pookies I'm back wth it's been so long 

Idk I think I'm experiencing what it feels to be actually kind of interested in someone (without choosing it yk) and this shit's horrible 

my life going a different kind of downhill every day 

actively looking for another father figure as mine says that he 'would accept me even if I'm a f* as long as it ain't 2 men f*'. like bro you want a prize for dad of the year just 'cause you' re doing the bare fucking minimum just to insult me and others right after??
          you don't even know if I am, you say this but you don't fucking know that yes I am gay. coming out isn't for me, I don't feel like I need it and all. but if I do so one day, you'll be the last damn person to know, be sure of that. even if I wasn't do you think I'd be proud or fucking relieved that my dad goes around insulting a whole community who never asked for shit just because he's an homophobic prick in denial? spoiler: no. 

I literally hate this shit, I jump on the occasion to go away because everything's shitty, and when I'm finally somewhere else it's the same fucking thing. I hate life. 

dayum those [mommy issues] has really been kicking hard these days 

I really hope Harry's finally getting this whole 'leave america' thing bc I would give my soul to see him in concert tbh 

got my clown certificate wbu

Bangtan dinner was sooo good. I'm super emotional rn. Like I loved all the little pep talk, the constructive thoughts of and for everyone. Then they started crying and yeah same. I'm so happy that they're taking this 'break'. They so deserve and need it and I know it's not easy but as an army my goal would be to make them understand that I feel so much loved thanks to them, they saved my life. I can't wait to continue this story as bts and army, as us, forever and ever. Yet to come honestly destroyed me. It's such a beautiful and meaningful song. But the last thing I want is for them to feel guilty and apologize to us when there's literally no reason to. It ain't about living up to our expectations. We dont have much. Just for us to stay happy together for the longest time. And it obviously means taking time for one self. Really. I'm so grateful for everything, for having them by my side. Thank you so much and let's get it! <3