Vocela

There's some things that I need to get off my chest. I know people probably won't read this, and I'm not writing it to get a response. Just to let out some things that I feel and have been dragging me down. I am extremely messed up. I am broken in ways that are hard to explain but I'll try to just to get them off my chest. I am mentally abused. From a young age I have been shot down and kept from speaking my personal opinion because I was taught that what I have to say and generally feel is insignificant in the long run. I have a lot of self conscious issues because my mother has raised me to be proud of how skinny I always was, and now that I've gained weight and my size has gone up, I've been getting a hard time for it, even though I was only that skinny because I was anorexic.  I also have ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) and depression and anxiety. A lot of that has gotten better, but the continuous mental abuse from family has left me to be in quite a few places. I have sudden mood changes and personality shifts from time to time. Also, due to my upbringing, I've learned how to fit into any situation so long as it doesn't involve talking in front of people (again, fear of being seen as wrong and being shot down once again). I've been turned into a chameleon and because of that I don't really know who I am personally. I was never able to grown into being my own person. I know that it makes me seem really fake, not being my true self and hiding behind a mask, but that's all I know how to do. These masks that I have been raised to wear have shaped me and I've been trying to become my own person and discover my true self. I simply wanted to write this and get this out so I can look back at it and see that this is a piece of myself trying to make a connection and I can go forward. It also allows other people who may be facing the same troubles know that they're not alone. Again, I don't expect a response to this, but thanks for letting me get it out.

Ladybaby314

@Vocela I know what your going through manly because I am your sister and I have to go through the same things. I have been a submissive people pleaser sense I was little and I get mentally and physically abused. I haven't known who I am sense I was little I don't even know the reasons behind everything I do. I don't even know my own fears. I'm here for you you can rant to me all you want whenever you want.
• Rispondi

Nightmau

@Vocela Thank you, wish you luck
• Rispondi

Vocela

@Nightmau I know. I've made a lot of great friends over the years and I have a great man in my life who supports me through my roughest times. That's why I've gotten so much better. I still have it rough but I know that it'll get better for me eventually. Thank you for the support though. I'm here to talk to if you need help as well.
• Rispondi

Vocela

There's some things that I need to get off my chest. I know people probably won't read this, and I'm not writing it to get a response. Just to let out some things that I feel and have been dragging me down. I am extremely messed up. I am broken in ways that are hard to explain but I'll try to just to get them off my chest. I am mentally abused. From a young age I have been shot down and kept from speaking my personal opinion because I was taught that what I have to say and generally feel is insignificant in the long run. I have a lot of self conscious issues because my mother has raised me to be proud of how skinny I always was, and now that I've gained weight and my size has gone up, I've been getting a hard time for it, even though I was only that skinny because I was anorexic.  I also have ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) and depression and anxiety. A lot of that has gotten better, but the continuous mental abuse from family has left me to be in quite a few places. I have sudden mood changes and personality shifts from time to time. Also, due to my upbringing, I've learned how to fit into any situation so long as it doesn't involve talking in front of people (again, fear of being seen as wrong and being shot down once again). I've been turned into a chameleon and because of that I don't really know who I am personally. I was never able to grown into being my own person. I know that it makes me seem really fake, not being my true self and hiding behind a mask, but that's all I know how to do. These masks that I have been raised to wear have shaped me and I've been trying to become my own person and discover my true self. I simply wanted to write this and get this out so I can look back at it and see that this is a piece of myself trying to make a connection and I can go forward. It also allows other people who may be facing the same troubles know that they're not alone. Again, I don't expect a response to this, but thanks for letting me get it out.

Ladybaby314

@Vocela I know what your going through manly because I am your sister and I have to go through the same things. I have been a submissive people pleaser sense I was little and I get mentally and physically abused. I haven't known who I am sense I was little I don't even know the reasons behind everything I do. I don't even know my own fears. I'm here for you you can rant to me all you want whenever you want.
• Rispondi

Nightmau

@Vocela Thank you, wish you luck
• Rispondi

Vocela

@Nightmau I know. I've made a lot of great friends over the years and I have a great man in my life who supports me through my roughest times. That's why I've gotten so much better. I still have it rough but I know that it'll get better for me eventually. Thank you for the support though. I'm here to talk to if you need help as well.
• Rispondi

Vocela

@GummiKitsune Welcome to the abyss. *is still cuddled with the kittens and there are more around the room*

Saccharkitsune

Yay!
• Rispondi

Vocela

@GummiKitsune HELL YEAH I DO. *coughs* I mean yes. *turns it on while I cuddle my Toothless plushie*
• Rispondi

Saccharkitsune

Um..... do you have How to Train Your Dragon by any chance?
• Rispondi

KittyKat060412

Thank you for the follow and I’m happy you enjoyed my work

Vocela

@KittyKat060412 Of course. And I'm sure that he'll be very smart with such a talented writer as a mother and as you said a "big science nerd" as a father. I wish you the best of luck in life. May you always find happiness and joy in the world.
• Rispondi

KittyKat060412

That’s very true. And I think he’ll be more like his dad Haha his a big science nerd and my son loves space and the sky already so I think he’ll be like that which I don’t mind at all. Thank you very much for waiting it really dose mean a lot to me
• Rispondi

Vocela

@KittyKat060412 I don't mind. And I bet that he's going to be just as creative as you. Take your time. Family comes first. I'm ready in waiting to read when you update and here as support.
• Rispondi

Vocela

@EpicWritingCupcake

Vocela

@EpicWritingCupcake Hey. How are you?
• Rispondi

cronchonthatbathbomb

@Vocela  hi :3
• Rispondi